MTN Dew Zero Sugar

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MTN Dew Zero Sugar

I normally avoid diet or zero sugar sodas because they aren’t something I’d drink on my own.  The more I think about it though, the less sense it makes. They are only getting more popular and tasting more and more like “the real thing”.  The one energy drink I consume is a zero sugar beverage so instead of fighting the sucralose wave I might as well attempt to surf it. As I paddle my board out there I see today’s offering, Mtn Dew Zero Sugar.

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MTN Dew VooDEW

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MTN Dew VooDEW

here needs to be more Halloween themed sodas.  This isn’t a particularly controversial stance, but more voices need to speak up about this.  Soda is liquid sugar. Halloween is the sugariest holiday. Why shouldn’t they be together forever? Thankfully, Mtn Dew has done their part over the years making Pitch Black and Pitch Black 2.  The latter of which had mixed reviews. Fortunately, this year they decided puns were scary and created VooDEW.

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Coca-Cola Orange Vanilla

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Coca-Cola Orange Vanilla

The first I heard of Coca-Cola Orange Vanilla I was skeptical. The cola/orange pairing didn’t seem like it would work. I thought it would be too messy for the vanilla to navigate around. Now that I have it in front of me I’m kind of excited. Coca-Cola is a huge company, and they don’t release new flavors like this often. I’m sure the market research and taste tests for this new flavor point to it being a success. Why would they make it otherwise?

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Coca-Cola Georgia Peach

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Coca-Cola Georgia Peach

Ah Summer! The sun beats down oppressively onto the pavement below. Just looking outside causes beads of sweat to collect on your brow. Nothing to escape this violent hellscape other than an ice cold Coca-Cola.

First off it’s Winter. Secondly, you should be drinking water if you’re sweating that much. Finally, todays soda review isn’t just for Coca-Cola, it’s for Coca-Cola Georgia Peach.

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Fanta Green Apple

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Fanta Green Apple

I’m always looking for sodas to review, and as the years go by it becomes harder and harder to do.  When I started I had to search out Virgil’s, Izze, Jones, and the like. Now those sodas are common staples at the end of almost every grocer’s soda aisle.  It’s getting harder to find new things I haven’t tried, but I sometimes find things where I least expect. Today’s entry I found in a car dealership vending machine.  Vending machines are great because they often have at least one odd selection, and you don’t have to commit to buying a pack of soda.

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MTN DEW.S.A.

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MTN DEW.S.A.

As we approach July 4th a swell of patriotism may begin to fill the chests of American’s.  MTN Dew has given us the opportunity to pair this patriotism with bubbly sugar water with not one, but three flavors.  MTN DEW.S.A. (GET IT?!) is what I hold in my hand thanks to one J. Dewitsky.  The three Dew flavors that have been combined to create this are Code Red, White Out, and Voltage.  The flavors, as you DEW Heads may have noticed, are red, white, and blue.  They are really hammering this theme here, so we might as well indulge in it ourselves.

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7UP

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I didn’t think I’d be writing a review of 7UP, but here we are. Back in 2011 I reviewed Retro 7UP, the cane sugar sweetened version of what I’m about to drink. Since 7UP, in it’s most common state, is filled with HFCS it felt needed to included on the site. Is this considered stat padding? Perhaps… but it’s different enough to count, just like you. There, don’t you feel motivated now?

The green tail of a plastic iguana wraps around a 7.5 ounce can of 7-UP.

Opening the can created a thunderous crack, much more so than any cans I can remember opening in recent memory. The scent that wafts out is a familiar one, more crisp lime than lemon but so bright a smell that it’s hard to not just call it citrus. Let’s drink, shall we?

A somewhat sticky lime/lemon taste immediately coats my mouth. Through no fault of it’s own I remember being sick. You see, 7UP was the “go to” cure all for an upset stomach in my house as a kid, often paired with a sleeve of Ritz crackers. So while 7UP is by far and away my favorite of the mainstream lemon/lime sodas, there is also the curtain of sick nostalgia that weighs it down.

The sips begin with a sharp burn on the back of my throat, and after three or four a burp is summoned burning just a little bit more skin off the ol’ uvula. The lemon and lime play nicely together, sharing my tastebuds equally. The aftertaste is sticky, but pleasant. It mirrors the initial flavor of the beverage instead of being some fun house mirror version of it. All in all I still enjoy the occasional 7UP and often keep it stocked in my fridge along side the Dr Pepper. Are they the fanciest sodas around? No, of course not, but they hold strong in my own personal culture.

~A


Dr Pepper

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How have we not reviewed Dr Pepper in the year of our lord two thousand seventeen? Perhaps I avoided it as I would avoid cutting myself as the lifeblood that flows throughout my veins is not so dissimilar to the nectar that is Dr Pepper. Often imitated never duplicated (though Dr B from HEB comes pretty close) Dr Pepper stands atop a mountain of others like Dr Thunder, Dr Dynamite, and the now vanquished Mr. Pibb who was so embarrassed that he changed his name to Pibb Xtra even though no one calls him that.

Cracking open a Dr Pepper gives way to a cherry scent, one of the 23 flavors it claims to have. Cherry is backed by plum in my humble opinion, but with 22 other flavors to choose from it’s just as likely a combination of them.

The taste is one of familiarity. With the exception of citrus, Dr Pepper is somewhat of an everything soda. Cola, root beer, cream soda, and fruit sodas are all represented within each sip. Dr Pepper is sweet, sweeter than most colas… even Pepsi. The smooth texture makes coming back to the can easier than ever, but there’s a slight burn in the back of the throat created by the carbonation. The carbonation in a Dr Pepper is sneaky, seemingly smooth, but will immediately remind you within a few sips that you have ingested quite a few bubbles.

Dr Pepper builds on itself a little with each sip, but eventually plateaus before it becomes overwhelmingly sweet. My teeth can definitely feel the syrupy goodness, so a glass of water is usually welcomed after I’ve finished a can or bottle. That said, it’s a delightful soda all around and one I keep in stock at all times.

~A

Sprite Tropical Mix

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Sprite Tropical Mix

I was asked years ago what “retired” sodas I would bring back if given the opportunity.  My answer was Surge, Crystal Pepsi, and Sprite Tropical Re-mix.  Apparently my answer was then run through a series of computers and control groups which found it to be profitable because all of these sodas from my past exist again.

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Coca-Cola Life

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Those of you who read this site like a blog instead of a review site (thank you, btw) know that I don’t really dabble in the mainstream unless asked.  The three of you who fit the former descriptor also know I’m not really fond of stevia as a sweetener.  So why then did I purchase a bottle of Coca-Cola Life which is sweetened with stevia?  Sorry, let me rephrase that to get more clicks…

YOU’LL NEVER BELIEVE WHY AARON DRANK COKE WITH STEVIA!  REASON NUMBER 4 WILL SHATTER ALL OF REALITY!!!

So I bought it because when I’m on the soda aisle I’ve seen numerous folks stop and stare at it.  Then they have a conversation with their significant other about it, then they walk off without trying it.  I’ve tried to help people understand what it was, but I honestly couldn’t tell them if it was good or not which is what you’re looking for in that situation.

People love Coke and even though this version of Coke is sweetened with stevia it’s also sweetened with cane sugar.  Previous reviews of mine have shown that a Cane Sugar/Stevia mix is usually a pretty good way to reduce calories and keep a nice flavor.  My 8oz bottle has 60 calories and 16 grams of sugar… less than the yogurt I just ate, but that’s not saying much.

"Life" Why Life?

Smell wise it’s a little weaker than regular Coca-Cola, but the scent is still unmistakable.  If this does indeed taste like regular Coke I’ll fully get behind this product.  Other than the fact that it’s called Coca-Cola “Life”.  That’s a bit pretentious to me.  Your soda is called “Life”, take it down a few notches.

So it tastes like a reduced calorie cola.  Granted, it tastes like a Coke brand reduced calorie cola, so they nailed that aspect of it.  Initially you get the quick bite of Coca-Cola Classic, but mouthfeel is really where the two sodas are most similar.   

There is limited flavor on the front end and the sweetness also kind of drops off on the back side, which makes the included stevia a bit more noticeable.  The “after sip” mouthfeel is a little sticky and hugs my teeth and tongue in an unpleasant, but tolerable way.  It’s not great, it’s not bad, it’s just kind something I’m drinking.  

Personally I’d choose Coca-Cola Zero over this every time as I think it gets closer to the Coke taste than “Life” does.  That kind of makes me feel that this may be a wasted product.  Does Coca-Cola Life fill the “wants to drink healthier soda without aspartame” crowd?  If anyone has the money to create something in that market it’s certainly Coca-Cola.

~A

This was purchased at my neighborhood Wal-Mart.​

Strawberry Shasta

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Here’s something odd, well at least I find it odd.  I’ve never had a Shasta soda that I can remember.  It’s Shasta!  How have I lived 31 years and never had one.  The mascot of one of our local universities is named Shasta, yet trying the drink has eluded me.  I’m not exactly sure how a mascot’s name and me trying a soda tie in together, but that doesn’t matter when it’s something as silly as this.  A nice lady I work with, whom I will name Good Morning, put me on a mission to find Strawberry Shasta.  Upon searching for it I found that the only places near me that sold Shasta were Brookshire Bros. grocery stores.  Now I’m not sure how it is where you live, but around here Brookshire Bros. are located in more rural areas so I rarely see one.  Well, Good Morning was driving past one by chance and made the U-turn to check it out.  Long story somewhat shorter, she brought me a Shasta Strawberry to review. 

Glancing at the ingredients I quickly see that Shasta Strawberry is chock full of chemical goodness.  I wasn’t expecting anything amazing here, so my thoughts have not been swayed.  This can art is keeping me in a positive mood.  It feels so fun and retro while keeping the can fresh and eye-catching.  Hopefully the flavor is on the fun side.

Twist smells of strawberries.

It smells of strawberry soda.  Ok, a little more detail is necessary.  It’s not quite as sugary smelling as I thought it would be, but the chemical mixture inside keeps it from smelling like fresh strawberries or any nonsense like that.

Wow, color me somewhat slightly impressed.  Shasta Strawberry, even with 36 grams of sugar in it, doesn’t taste a sugar sandwich made with sugar, marshmallows, sugar, sugar, and some strawberry syrup.  No, in fact this tastes merely like sugar, carbonated water, and strawberry syrup which oddly enough is a step in the right direction for strawberry sodas.  Enough blabbering, this tastes like the carbonated version of those little strawberry candies your grandmother bought back in 1985.  If you want to buy over five pounds of these candies or just want to know what I’m talking about click this fabulous link.  Anywho, these strawberry candies (and Strawberry Shasta) have the talent of chemically mimicking both the tart and sweet aspects of our friend the strawberry.  It is this feature that allows me to gently nudge Shasta Strawberry past its numerous counterparts.

~A

 

Mello Yello

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As many of you know I’m from Texas, and I’m just mad about Saffron.  This is an important fact to consider for the review today.  You see, I’m reviewing Mello Yello.  Mello Yello is a very mainstream brand and many of you may be wondering why I’m just now picking up a can to review.  So why have I, Aaron the Texan, decided that Mello Yello was important enough to review?  For whatever reason, Mello Yello has been nearly impossible to find in Texas for several years now.  It’s almost like Coke just kind of gave up on ever taking the market back from Mountain Dew.  I’m sure bringing it “back” to Texas was just a move that was fueled by money, but part of me thinks that SunDrop’s rise to national distribution might have had to do something with it as well.  For those of you not in the “kno”, Mello Yello is Coke’s version of Mountain Dew.  That’s the easiest way to explain what they were trying to go for when Coke created it.  It’s made with chemicals, orange juice concentrate, and now sits in a snazzy looking retro can in front of me.  I do love the can art by the way.  If there is one thing that Mello Yello has already beaten Mountain Dew and SunDrop on… it’s the can art.  So very simple, so very classic in styling, so very yello.  I mean, yellow.  I think it’s time to get this review started… quite rightly.

At first whiff Mello Yello puts off a scent more akin to Sprite than that of Mountain Dew.  However when I give it the old college try and breathe in a bit more the familiar scent of mixed citrus is what prevails.  Let’s see how well they compare in flavor.

Oh this will be easy!  Mello Yello is watered down Mountain Dew.  See ya next week folks!

~A

Ok, so maybe I should expound on this statement a little first.  If SunDrop or Mountain Dew didn’t exist then Mello Yello would be fantastic.  The fact that they do though makes you immediately compare each to another allowing us to not settle for a lesser soda which in this case is Mello Yello.  With each sip of Mello Yello you experience a rather flavorless journey until you near the end of it.  It’s almost as if they tried too hard to be refreshing and in doing so lost anything unique and fun about their beverage.  Only at the end of each gulp/sip/drink do you get the hit of citrus you probably expected since the beginning.  In the “Points For” category, I can identify several of the citrus flavors they used in making this, but the flavor overall is still a disappointment.  The carbonation works well with the flavor it’s given, but I honestly don’t care at this point. 

If any of you think I’m being too harsh on Mello Yello then know it’s with great sorrow that I do so.  One of my favorite advertising campaigns was that of Mello Yello.  Jim Varney, better known as Ernest P. Worrell, is still to this day only one of three celebrity deaths I’ve actually been saddened by in my time on Earth.  Sure the Ernest movies became overly stupid as they continued on, but the man made me laugh as a child and now as an adult.  During that time that he was making people laugh he was a spokesman for the “Make the Mello Yello Move” campaign.  To this day I can watch these commercials and enjoy them to the same degree I did as a child, if not more so.  I want to like this drink.  Ernest liked this drink, or was at least paid to.  I’m going to watch a couple of these ads, three of them actually, and see if it doesn’t improve upon my opinion of Mello Yello.  Be right back! 

Sigh….not even the great Jim Varney could sway my vote, and now  I’m more depressed than ever.  Back to the review.

Like I noted earlier the can art is awesome.  The can art hands down beats the competitors.  Let’s me focus on the can art for a moment and hopefully that will get me out of this funk.  The design on this Mello Yello can seems to harken back to simpler times.  Simpler Times, when a Peanut Farmer was President, when a stamp cost you 15 cents, and when a gallon of gas was under a dollar.  Guess what?  I wasn’t alive back then so the retro can is unable to work its magics on me.  Mello Yello is watered down Mountain Dew.  KnowwhatImean?

~A

Mello Yello580.jpg

I'll probably be snuffed out for telling you this, but it's too important not to.  Twist. Is. Vern.