Sioux City Cream Sod

Yee haw, Buckaroos!  What I got here is the rootin-ist, tootin-ist bottle of cream soda this side of the Mississip!  Sioux City Cream Soda!  Of course anything associated with the old west is gonna be made with cane sugar!  Good, simple, old fashioned cane sugar… and sodium benzoate like mom used to make!  Gracing the label art of this cool clear bottle is a real deal cowboy riding his horse to the west… or east… or north… or south… well it really just depends on how you hold the bottle.  Personally I think they missed an opportunity to call this Cowboy Cream Soda because I’d have bought a pack of it off the name alone.  Anywho, I’m powerful thirsty so let’s get this going.

Ahh the sweet smell of cream soda!  While cream soda isn’t my favorite beverage to consume I will argue with just about anyone that it has one of the best aromas out there and Sioux City doesn’t disappoint.   If someone disagrees with me I just might have to hobble your lip.  With that said, it’s time to bend an elbow!

The initial taste of Sioux City Cream Soda isn’t as sweet as I thought it might be but it doesn’t let you down either.  For just a split second I taste what seems like a diet drink only to be quickly covered up by the smooth texture/taste of what should be expected of a cream soda.  The diet flavoring really dry gulches you before giving way to its smoother brethren.  It’s as if you’re watching a magician get ready to pull something out of his hat and you see what you think is a rabbit tucked down in there.  You’re disappointed of course but you still feel the need to see the trick through.  Blammo the Magician then reaches into his hat and pulls out an iguana.  You’re not stunned but you’re left surprised by the outcome.  The smooth mouth feel of Sioux City Cream Soda is nice but it’s not as fine as cream gravy… I’ve had better.  The carbonation level is right where it should be but I find myself not caring that much about it anyway for some reason.  I really thought that since this was made with cane sugar and overall good ingredients I’d be a bit more impressed.  When it comes to figuring out why it didn’t quite do that… well, I’m at sea.  I’m not saying this is shoddy by any means but as far as cream sodas go this one is between hay and grass.

~A

Twist is wanted in over 2 dozen counties.

Sprecher Ravin' Red

   I’ve been saving this soda.  I’ve been saving this soda because I think it’s going to be amazing and I want the review to do it justice.  What I have in front of me is a Sprecher’s Ravin’ Red.  Allow me to translate what flavor Ravin’ Red is.  Ravin’ Red is a cran-cherry soda with ginseng.  There is not one thing wrong with the list of flavors I typed up in that last sentence and that’s what excites me.  Sure Sprecher’s uses HFCS but they’ve shown in the past that they plug past that and create fantastic products.  The ingredient listed before HFCS is Door County Cherry Juice and later on down the label you find Wisconsin Rapids Cranberry Juice with some raw Wisconsin honey.  There are so many other sweeteners in here besides HFCS thus negating my care of their usage.  The label is also adorned with red raven flying through the air carrying a bag of cranberries and two cherries.  How I wish I could get a shirt with this amusing character on it.  Enough chatter.

   The scent that escapes the neck of the bottle is that of a slight cranberry.  I can’t smell the cherry at all but that’s not saying it isn’t there.   I’m not enticed by the scent but of course I will push on for the greater cause.

   Very nice.  All three listed flavors are present in each sip.  You are initially hit with the cranberry for a short period of time allowing the cherry to peek it’s head around the corner.  It’s not quite time for the cherry to go on stage yet because the ginseng pushes him back behind the curtain and makes his own appearance.  When the ginseng is done trying to be the star of the show the cherry reappears with one of the most delicious subtle finishes I’ve had in a long time.  Your mouth is left with a delightful cherry taste that you know is juice and not flavoring.  The mouth feel of this beverage ranges from the sharp feel of the cranberry on the back of your throat to the ever so smooth feel of cherry afterward.  Nothing about this beverage is overly sweet but I can’t figure out what I would pair it with if I was eating.  Honestly I guess it could be a good buddy to a burger or something along those lines.  The only downside I can find to this beverage is that its flavor builds up in your mouth.  Each sip becomes richer and richer until you’re not sure you want anymore.  The bottle I’m drinking from is 16 oz but I’d be perfectly happy with 12.  I’m going to stop here before I ruin my experience by over indulging myself on Sprecher’s Ravin’ Red.  Moderation my friend, moderation.

~A

Twist says he knows the raven on this bottle and that he's "good people".

Caballitos Mandarin

   “Little Horses”.  That’s what Caballitos translates into and that’s the name of the beverage I’m about to consume.  To be technical its mandarin flavored Caballitos.  If I was a more learned man I would know why Mexican sodas seem to popularly end in “itos”.  Jarritos, Barralitos, and now Caballitos.  Hopefully in the next 13.5 fluid ounces (that’s 400 ml for my metric friends) I’ll be a little closer to that answer but probably not.  Since this soda is Mexican I don’t even have to worry about finding HFCS on the ingredients label.  Nope!  Good old sugar is what sweetens this drink!  The bottle art for Caballitos seems to be a horse exploding from underneath a bottle cap.  The explosion caused by said horse apparently disrupted the Universe of Orange as orange pieces are flying hither and thither.  Let’s open ‘er up shall we?

   Huff as I might I only get the slightest of scents from the mouth of the bottle.  The mandarin scent is so very, very faint but we still must press on!  Drink up!

   This is the tamest orange soda I think I’ve had to date.  There is very little carbonation, very little bite, and the flavor is just so very average.  This tastes as if you took Sunkist Orange soda and added 3 parts water but then somehow took away the sensation of “watered down”.  Caballitos Mandarin doesn’t taste like watered down orange soda… it just weakly sits there.  The horse on the side art must be trying to leave the bottle as he is much too powerful of a mascot to be left upon such a mundane bottle of soda.  (Spoilers from The NeverEnding Story are coming up next, so beware Ralph ”The only guy who hasn’t seen The NeverEnding Story” Stevens.)  Sadly, much like Artax from the NeverEnding Story he must sit there and slowly meet his demise.  “Artax, you're sinking! Come on, turn around, you have to, now! Come on! Artax! Fight against the sadness, Artax.”  That scene hurt me so very much as a child.  I was very attached to Artax since we’d been through so much together in that movie.  Then as an adult I watched the movie again.  The horse dies like 10 minutes after you first meet him… TEN MINUTES!  They jarred my fragile child psyche with the death of a horse I met ten minutes ago!  On a higher note… wasn’t that luck dragon creepy/cool?  Where was I… oh yeah (Spoilers End).  Caballitos is very average orange, sorry, mandarin soda.  It doesn’t taste bad but it does absolutely nothing to set it apart from the pack… well except re-injure my childhood’s emotional scars.

~A

Twist was rooting for the Nothing the entire time... he's heartless like that.

Henry Weinhard's Root Beer

   Since You’ve Been Gone somebody told me that Henry Weinhard’s Root Beer was the best root beer hands down.  I of course was doubtful because I don’t trust people that use the phrase “hands down”.  Nonetheless I still started seeking out said root beer, asking various store Clerks, but found other Henry Wienhard products instead both of which were delicious!  Now with Henry Weinhard Root Beer in hand I can either validate or nullify the statement that was made to me so long ago.  On a side note it’s really hard for me to remember the name Henry Weinhard. 

   Now I just got through walking my Dogma so I’m pretty thirsty.  Upon opening the bottle I’m greeted by the meek aroma of root beer.  Now had this review been written 40 Days and 40 Nights ago I would have been wary about this weak smell.  Not anymore though.  So many times I’ve thought that the smell was the Master and Commander of the drink… setting the tone to what was to follow.  So many times this has proven to be false.  Time to drink and think.

   Let’s just get the initial question out of the way.  Sorry, this is not the greatest root beer “hands down”.  That’s just Sex, Lies, and Video Tape.  This is a good root beer though and should not be overlooked.  If you’re at Muriel’s Wedding in Chicago and the Priest offers you this is I highly suggest you try it.  You start off with a rather unique flavor that is still unmistakably root beer.  You can tell they didn’t try to Mimic any of the other root beers on the market.  What follows is a smooth root beer flavor followed by a quick snap of bubbles.  You could chug this and be just fine.  In fact you could drink this from Dusk Till Dawn.  The smooth mouth feel of this root beer is very nice; it reminds you that Life is Beautiful.  Your mouth doesn’t feel syrupy after drinking it (which is surprising since they use HFCS as a sweetener) and the unique flavor stays with you throughout.  Holy Smoke, I forgot to look at the ingredients.  I’m Wide Awake and I forgot to look... I’m losing my edge.  Well now that I’m looking I see that they use honey in the making of this beverage.  That is definitely one of the attributing factors to this unique sub-taste.  I make up the word sub-taste because it’s not the flavor that holds dominance in your mouth that I’m talking about but the one that hides in the shadows and peeks out afterwards.  Your Henry Weinhard’s Root Beer experience is capped off with a fairly clean ending, leaving a pleasant aftertaste.  Even though this is a great beverage and I suggest you enjoy it I leave you with this advice.  Don’t be a Menace to South Central While Drinking Your Root Beer in the Hood.  Anywho… time for me to Bounce.

~The Tall Guy from Happy, TX

P.S. - Princess Mononoke

Twist's favorite Miramax movie?  Godzilla vs Biollante of course.

Jarritos Strawberry

For my review today I picked something I know will probably be good… because it’s Jarritos.  Jarritos has one of the strongest lines of soda I’ve come across.  Who would have known that when I was a teenager my choice of picking the “alternative soda” was actually a great idea?  You see my best friend and I would stay at each other’s house overnight on some weekends and to make sure that we stayed up late we’d have to hit up the corner store for some soda.  How could you possibly play Golden Eye/Resident Evil/Rampage for 18 hours straight without it?  We picked Jarritos not because it was made with cane sugar, had a great taste, or had amazing flavors.  We picked it because it was weird to us.  Mexican soda?  WHAT?!  That’s crazy!  It’s funny and sad how “other worldly” Jarritos seemed at the time but I’m very happy to be drinking it now, hopefully appreciating it to its fullest extent.  Oh… by the way.  Today’s drink is Jarritos Strawberry!  You know the drill.

This smells like a syrupy strawberry soda.  My nostrils can taste the sweetness that will soon be on my tongue.  I’d go on but my drink is warming up… I do actually drink and write these at the same time you know. 

Wow… that’s a much lighter mouth feel that I was expecting.  Here I was thinking it was going to be heavy and syrupy but once again I’ve been surprised by Jarritos.  It starts off as a somewhat light and bubbly strawberry soda and finishes with a heavier feel.  My tongue can still feel the bubbles well after it’s gone down my gullet adding to the pleasurable experience.  You get most of the sweetness about 3/4ths through your gulp.  It’s like the sweet strawberry flavoring is waiting in the shadows ready to pounce but then jumps a bit earlier than it wanted too.  Your tongue is attacked by the carnivorous strawberry but fights it off only to walk away with a few battle scars in its remembrance.  Wave after wave of tiny, vicious strawberry attacks doing its best to thwart your tongue but no… your tongue is a warrior.  Your tongue has taken on envelope glue, 9 volt batteries, and even Malta Hatuey.  These tiny delicious strawberries are no match and show as such when they burst into tiny fizzy bubbles upon their death.  At the end of the battle your tongue is stained red with their blood.  Suddenly a warm strawberry scented breeze blows from the south.  Your tongue now knows that its job is done and lays dormant until the next meeting.  One more thing...

~A

(This bottle was given to us by Jarritos)

Faux Fact:  All sensations feel bubbly to iguanas.

Rat Bastard Root Beer

   Rat Bastard Root Beer.  That’s the name of the beverage in front of me today.  The letters that form the name of this beverage are scrawled in white upon a plain grey background.  I’d say it was boring if it wasn’t for the other “witty” words adorning the bottle.  Phrases such as “It’s us against them”, “What you’ll be drinking”, and my particular favorite “Quit being a dick.  Drink it.”  Rat Bastard Root Beer uses HFCS for sweetener but then comes out of nowhere with several odd herbs for flavoring.  There’s a few ginsengs in there, some jasmine, clove, skullcap, capsicum, kava kava, and so many other strange herbs I wouldn’t think to add to a beverage.  Well I pride myself in being a Jerk but I will not be called a dick without just cause.  Let’s just open this already. 

   It has a great rooty aroma that comes right out and hits you in the face.  Even though this may not be sweetened with sugar I’m still looking forward to this first gulp.

   The smell, as it so often seems to be, is much stronger than the taste and this disappoints me.  I expected something called Rat Bastard Root Beer to take me by the throat and shake me until I enjoyed their product.  For goodness sake they used peer pressure to get me to drink it… who wants to be a dick?  The insane herbal blend they use is only slightly noticeable but it does make your tongue tingle in an interesting way.  The flavor most resembles that of Barq’s if I must compare it to one of the big mainstream three.  Barq’s has more bite… which once again makes me sad that I let my mind rev this beverage up based on its name alone.  I will say that it has a relatively clean finish… so… good for you Rat Bastard Root Beer.  Shame on you for having such an extreme name for such a tamely flavored soda.  “Nice Guy Root Beer” would have worked better for the flavor I just ingested but you’d still get the same rating.

~A

Don't worry, Twist punished this bottle for calling him a dick.

Jelly Belly Crushed Pineapple

   Hey everybody, it’s time for another Jelly Belly soda review!  I’m not sure why I started this review out with such fanfare.  It’s not like everyone waits with great anticipation for me to write another Jelly Belly soda review… especially since I’ve only reviewed Jelly Belly Juicy Pear.  Anyway, today we’ve got Jelly Belly Crushed Pineapple to try and I’m raring to give it a go.  Of course like the last Jelly Belly soda it’s made with 100% Cane Sugar and naturally flavored.  Sadly it still houses the demon known as Sodium Benzoate.  Well enough chatter, let’s open up the bottle imprisoning the yellow sugar water and give it a go.

   Wow… this doesn’t smell like pineapple as much as it smells like pineapple cake.  I wasn’t really expecting that but it’s a welcome surprise.  I’m a big fan of pineapple upside down cake so hopefully this drink is a liquefied version of such.  Although assuming that may just lead me down heartbreak road.  You know what happens when you assume don’t you?  It makes an ass of you… the reader… not me… but you.  Time to drink!

   Aaaand here comes the positive review.  This is the best pineapple soda I’ve ever had.  It does taste a bit like pineapple upside down cake but it mostly reminds me of a Dole-Whip.  For those of you who are unaware of the magic that is a Dole-Whip let me explain.  A Dole-whip is soft serve pineapple ice cream.  You can even put said pineapple ice cream into pineapple juice making it a Dole-Whip Float.  There are only three places that you can consume just magical splendor:  The Dole Plantation in Hawaii, In Disneyland right outside of the Enchanted Tiki Room, at WDW in Adventureland and also in the Polynesian Resort, and finally at some place called Jumpin' Jack's Drive-In in Scotia, NY.  I used to work at WDW and even sold a Dole Whip or 8 billion at one time so I’m fairly familiar with them.  Needless to say even though I’m not wacky for pineapples I’m a colossal fan of Dole-Whips.  Seriously… next chance you get you should try one.  No, no… I’ll just wait for you all to try one.  Go on, save up your money.  I’ll wait.

(Read this next part in a few years.  Take your time, I’m in no rush.)

   We all caught up now?  Good, it was worth it wasn’t it?  So now that it’s several years in the future from when you started this article go ahead and stop in your local SodaJerks Poppery and have a cold Jelly Belly Crush Pineapple to compare.  It should be rather easy to do as we’re on every corner.  As you now know, Jelly Belly Pineapple soda isn’t as sweet as a Dole-Whip though and of course it doesn’t have the cream flavoring either but it’s a very good soda.  The carbonation level is low allowing more of the pineapple flavoring to penetrate your palate.  I really don’t think that this would be a beverage you’d have with a meal though either.  Jelly Belly Crushed Pineapple seems more like a dessert drink or something you’d enjoy while sitting in the shade on a hot day.  With all that said I should probably just rate it.  I mean you’ve waited this long, there’s no need to leave you waiting any more.

Aaron Manahan

CEO of SodaJerks Enterprises

Twist is head of sercurity now... just mind your S's and J's and no one will get hurt.

XAPP

   When I was approached (i.e. e-mailed) by the folks as XAPP asking if I wouldn’t mind reviewing their soda I was a bit skeptical.  You see XAPP soda isn’t your normal soda… it’s a workout soda.  What I mean by this is that it has 25g of protein in it to help you recover from your strenuous workings out.  The reason I was skeptical (going back to my initial sentence) was because I’ve never known a “workout” product to taste good.  Normally when I see the word “protein” slapped on a label I associate it with all those weight gain powder drinks that I tried to force myself to drink back when my family called me “Stick Boy”.  Needless to say I took XAPP up on their challenge with the stipulation that I only review the flavor aspect of XAPP soda… which by the way is fruit punch.  So this review will have nothing to do with how well it helps me recover from my work out.  XAPP comes with caffeine and without caffeine.  The caffeine version is what you’re supposed to drink pre-workout to help energize you.  Since I’d like to get some sleep relatively soon I’ve opted for the caffeine-free version.  Let’s open ‘er up and… wait… the ingredients of this include milk.  Skepticism level raised.  Any who, let’s open ‘er up and take a whiff. 

   Well it certainly smells like fruit punch so that’s a plus.  Skepticism level lowered (slightly).  It’s not the strongest fruit punch aroma I’ve ever encountered but it’s enough to make me think this might actually taste pretty decent.  There’s only one way to find out.

   Well the initial chug of the beverage is kind of pleasant.  It tastes like a light and fruity punch much like the listed flavor says.  The finish is what’s going to hurt XAPP soda but we’ll get to that.  It’s very lightly carbonated so you’re not going to be burping up a lot of this stuff when you’re done chugging it down.  I only say chugging because that to me is extreme drinking.  I figure you have to be extreme to drink this because the can is decorated with the look of carbon fiber.  If you’re drinking out of a “carbon fiber” can then you must be pretty extreme.  You won’t be “Smug looking guy I can’t stand wearing too tight a t-shirt/necklace with slicked back hair and sprayed on confidence… I mean tan” extreme, this is an acceptable level of extreme but I digress.  Back to when I said “the finish is what’s going to hurt XAPP soda…”  The finish is what’s going to hurt XAPP soda.  I say this because that’s when this begins to taste like a “workout” beverage.  The mouth feel isn’t gritty but it’s not a pleasant one either.  Texture wise it’s like the most liquidy mud you’ve ever seen.  No actual granules mind you but not something you want to keep ingesting for pleasure.  The more you drink it the more you mouth suffers from the buildup of this beverage.  It’s almost as if XAPP soda has a mouth drying effect the more you drink it.  With all that said it’s not the worst soda I’ve ever had and as far as “workout” products go I’d say it has one of the better flavors out there.   TheSodaJerks don’t review products based on how well they taste in their category though.  I’m not going to rank this because it tastes better than Hyper-Choco-Bo 9000.  In the end, which is nearing, the ranking is primarily based on how well its taste holds up in the soda world.  The initial taste really is kinda nice and if they could have held onto that flavor we’d be talking in cheerful tones right now.  Sadly though the initial flavor dissipates relatively quickly into the saddest finish since Crystal Skull. 

~A

(This drink provided to us by XAPP)

We didn't allow Twist to try this because we were afraid he'd become too powerful to control

Zuberfizz Cola

My experience with Zuberfizz has been well documented.  The short story is this… when the batch isn’t watery it tastes great!  The only problem is that I’ve come across more watery batches than I thought I ever would.  With that said let’s reach into the Ice Box and pull out a Zuberfizz Cola.  Same simplistic art on the bottle that I enjoy so much coupled with one of my favorite bottle caps to date.  Glad to see that the art never gets watered down… now let’s find out about the drink.

The odor wafting from the bottle is one rich in cola flavor.  I’d like to point out that those flavors turned odor are all natural as well!  Zuberfizz always has top notch ingredients and in part usually has a great aroma.  Smell is one thing to be excited about but it won’t tell us if this batch is watery.  For that we need to drink!

While I’m not sure if this is the actual achieved flavor I taste.  The flavor could be much stronger… and it could be much weaker, so there’s no telling.  The mouth feel of Zuberfizz Cola is very neutral but that’s ok because it works.  It has about as much fizz as a 2 liter that was opened the day before, so don’t think going into this you’re not going to experience any carbonation.  The flavor I’m greeted with is no doubt cola but it doesn’t find any similarity to Coke, Pepsi, or RC.  I didn’t realize how sweet this tasted until I didn’t drink it for a bit.  My mouth has a slight sugary film coating it much like a veil on a bride.  That was just an overly romantic way of saying that the film isn’t bad at all… it just exists and that’s ok.  Unlike the veil you can never remove the film which I’m sure after a while might get annoying.  “How many foggy days in a row has it been now, Dave?”  “It hasn’t been foggy all week Jane… you’re veil, remember?”  “Oh yes, how silly of me!   I don’t know why I don’t ever take my veil off?”  “I think you’re trying to strengthen some lame analogy in a soda review.”  “What?” “Never mind.”  Leaving Dave and Jane alone I leave you, the reader, with this.  Zuberfizz Cola is good.  Its ingredients are good.  Its bottle art is good but it just doesn’t stand out to me amongst a cola heavy market.

~A

(This Soda was supplied to us by Zuberfizz)

That's not a pineapple behind Twist... it's an Iguana Fruit ready to bloom.

Olde Brooklyn Orange Soda

   It’s been a while since I’ve done a review but thankfully a few citizens of the Carbonation have produced some outstanding reviews in my absence.  The site has a new look which I hope you like and I’m about to reference one of our newest sections!  The soda I’m pulling out of the Ice Box today is Olde Brooklyn Orange Soda.  The bottle art is what I assume to be the Brooklyn Bridge.  There’s also a nifty orange explosion happening on the neck of the bottle as well.  Other than those two things the bottle is fairly undecorated.  Looking at the ingredients shows us an assortment of interesting facts.  It’s sweetened with cane sugar which is always a positive but the thing that catches my attention even more is the nutrition label.  Apparently one bottle of this contains 2% of the calcium and 15% of the iron you need in a day.  I’m not sure if I’ve ever had an orange soda that had any iron in it at all, points to Olde Brooklyn Orange Soda for having this.  Enough with the chatter, let’s open this up.

   While the orange scent isn’t the strongest example I’ve ever encountered it’s still prevalent.  I’d say the majority of other orange sodas smell smell more sweetly of this .  Hopefully this will be a unique experience.  Time to find out.

   Well I can honestly say that I’ve never tasted an orange soda like this before.   It’s not nearly as tart as I thought it would be but I was correct in guessing that it wouldn’t be as sweet either.  The carbonation level is also fairly low.  It’s like you took a standard orange soda (Sunkist, Crush, etc) and muted the experience just a little bit.  “Oh no!” you say, “Guess we should just chalk this up as a loss.”  Wait, wait, wait, you random person that always seems to find their way into my house.  The muted orange flavoring actually works pretty well for Olde Brooklyn Orange Soda.  Many orange sodas are rather harsh on the throat not fully quenching your thirst.  Olde Brooklyn Orange Soda’s muted experience allows for more thirst quenching.  Just as the sharp mouth feel a soda brings can be a positive attribute for a soda the lack thereof helps set Olde Brooklyn Orange Soda apart from some of the other brands it might be competing against.  With that said…

Make sure when you enjoy your Olde Brooklyn Orange soda you do so with an iguana and a glass pineapple

SAPS Cola

   A nice man from the website DizzyFrinks.com (see what he did there) contacted me and made me an offer I couldn’t refuse.  If I was more into the Godfather I’d make a better joke here.  I went and checked out DizzyFrinks.com and really liked what I saw.  Great design, nice layout… heck if I had any kind of experience in web design it’s pretty much what our site would look like.  I noticed he had a good selection of German beverages and I was curious to try one.  After carefully looking over them all I eventually became the proud owner of a bottle of SAPS Cola.  So I must thank the fine folks at DizzyFrinks.com for opening my eyes to a beverage I probably wouldn’t have even thought of procuring.   Now that you’ve passed over three, count them, three hyperlinks to said website hopefully you’ll visit after you’re done reading this review. 

   Being from Germany, SAPS Cola’s bottle is filled with fun German words and phrases.  “Koffeinfrei” is the first one I notice and my rudimentary understanding of German deciphers that it means “Caffeine Free”.  Next up is the sentence “Mit Biohonig Gesuesst”.  Again my 3 years of high school German crack this coded sentence to mean “With Biohoney Gesuesst.”  Ok… so maybe I need to look this one up.  Ah, here we go… “Sweetened with Organic Honey”.  Thanks so much Google Translate.  The bottle design is kind of fun with a short stocky body attached to a long slender neck.  Sadly the label itself is fairly boring with the exception being a cartoon bee resting upon the “a” in the word “Cola”.  I looked up a little information on SAPS Cola and found out that it’s 100% natural, has won some awards, and has no preservatives.  All of these things normally point towards a great drink.  Let’s sniff it out a little more before we put a blue ribbon on the hog.  (Honestly I just wanted to write a made up country saying there.  I think I did pretty well.)

   Wow.  I never thought I’d be able to smell the honey so strongly upon opening this bottle.  If this review continues to go this well maybe more beverages should use Biohonig.  I literally only smell cola and honey and now I’m even more intrigued.  Shall I drink it now?  Yes I shall.

   That tastes nothing like I thought it would, which is a nice surprise.  I didn’t expect it to be gross or anything but the cola flavoring is much more muted than I predicted.  The initial flavor is a bit off putting but very familiar to me.  Well I guess it’s not completely familiar because I can’t pin point where I’ve tasted it before.  I know I’ve had at least one other soda that included this mystery flavor.  I’m starting to think that this is similar to the first half of a sip of Moxie.  As we all know the second half of Moxie tastes like carbonated tires.  Sadly I can’t claim that humorous description of Moxie but it was placed on the site and I enjoyed it to the point of adopting it.  I know they’re trying to get the cola taste through all natural means but the honey is the winning combatant in this battle.  I think that the flavor is one that most American palates would find unique and maybe a bit off putting at first but I must say the more I drink it the better it tastes.  It’s almost like the honey has a mind of its own and it slowing taking over my mouth.  Not to the point where a swarm of bees has claimed residence in my throat awkwardly flying out one by one to the confusion of everyone around me.  That would almost be worth it though.  I would randomly produce a bee from my mouth only to watch everyone in the room freak out until the bee landed safely back on my tongue only to go back home behind my molars.  One can dream can’t they?  One…can…dream.  Anywho, back to the beverage at hand.  The level of carbonation is low but that can be attributed to the fact that SAPS Cola is sweetened with honey.  Carbon Dioxide doesn’t bond as well with honey (or other natural but alternative sweeteners) as it does with sugar.  This in turn leads to a perfectly new soda tasting “flat”.  I wish I could say I knew that because of my immense chemistry background but in actuality I was told this by a soda manufacturer.  I used to be bothered by this flat taste when I started reviewing but I’ve come to appreciate the mouth feel of these drinks now.  They don’t attack your mouth and throat as much allowing you to focus on the beverage at hand instead of reacting to the initial buzz (haha, get it, buzz?) of the carbonation.  With all that said it’s time to put down a verdict.  I can honestly say that the ingredient list bumps this cola up a notch.  Would this by my drink of choice if I lived in Germany?  No, probably not.  Do I recommend you purchase this from overseas?  Nope.  If you live in Germany already but haven’t had the chance to try this should you?  Yes.  In fact…

Twist ist durstig

Jarritos Mexican Cola

   Jarritos does such a great job making sodas that we’ve reviewed every one of them so far… except Strawberry.  Our bottle of strawberry was lost to some goblins in a fan’s house.  One day… one day.  Any who, imagine my joy when a fan of ours, “AX2”, brought me a bottle of Jarritos Mexican Cola.  I wasn’t even aware Jarritos sold a cola in the United States so I had to research.  What I found was that Jarritos Mexican Cola had run an ad campaign with the sentence “It Crossed!” as the slogan.  I can only assume that this means it has only recently found a home here across the border.  Doesn’t matter though because I’m raring to try it! 

   After tracking down my bottle opener  for this twist proof cap I am welcomed by a robust soda aroma wafting from the lip of the bottle.  It’s a stronger cola smell than Coke produces so hopefully we’re looking at a strong contender in the best cola category.  Time for some drinkin’.

   Very nice!  Just the right amount of carbonation and a great cola taste.  It’s not as strong or acidic feeling on the throat as Coke is but Jarritos Mexican Cola definitely gets the point across.  There’s something a little different with the cola flavor in this soda than in others and I can’t quite put my finger on it.  It’s almost as if they put more syrup in it than you would think they would be able to.  This doesn’t weigh down the beverage, in fact it’s almost like they made the cola flavor more efficient.  I could find a mathematical formula to represent this but that would be boring and very inaccurate.  Oh heck here’s  one anyway:

   It’s almost as if they condensed the cola flavoring so that you get more than you would think per sip.  Like I said… I can’t put my finger on it.  Cinnamon maybe?  I dunno.  The big question is, “Is it better than Coke/Pepsi/RC?”  The answer is yes.  Jarritos of course uses sugar so that already gives it a leg up on the competition.  With that said, and sugar aside, the flavor/mouth feel from Jarritos Mexican Cola is better than that of the big boys.  I would choose this every time over “Red” or “Blue”.  If you can get some Jarritos Mexican Cola in your area do so, in fact…

~A

Twist needs a Mexican brother named Disparar for cases like this

Crush Lime

   I’m sleepy so let’s get this over with.  Aaron like lime soda, blah, blah, blah.  There aren’t many lime sodas on the market, yada, yada, yada.  Hopefully Crush Lime is delicious, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.  What I obviously have in front of me is a can of Crush Lime.  This was given to us by Dan Dub who I believe hated it.  Mike has since tried it and apparently loves the stuff.  I’ve been over thinking the order of drinks to review in my fridge and in a tired stupor picked this one out because it’d be the easiest to photograph (I could either photograph and then review it, or I could review it and then photograph).  Any who, this is a can of lime flavored soda which is made by Crush.  I like Crush Orange so I might as well give this one a shot as well.  Time to crack’er open. 

   Smells D-Lishus!  The first thing I thought of when I opened the can was candy.  This could very well be liquid lime candy.  I suppose most soda is liquid candy when you think about it but I don’t really want to think about it at the time.  I just want to drink this, so I shall.

   Well the initial taste is much weaker than I thought it would be.  The smell psyches you out, making you think you’re going to enjoy liquid lime candy when in fact you’re just drinking an average lime soda.  There isn’t a whole lot of fizz to Crush Lime, or Lime Crush as I’m sure everyone else in the world calls it.  I have no qualms with there being little fizz to this drink.  If it were any fizzier then the already muted lime flavoring would be stuffed even further back onto the bookshelf much like Garfield Tips the Scales: His Eighth Book.  The cat has like 50 something books and if you planned on collecting them as a kid you probably gave up around book 30 like I did.  To this day I’ll be going through my bookshelf and randomly find a Garfield book stuffed amongst my other bizarre reading material.  I found a Hi-lights magazine in there from 1987.  Guess what?  Goofus is still not ready for “big boy” scissors and Gallant will end up housing over 60 cats by the age of 42… most of them imaginary.  You know why I ranted just then?  I’ll tell you, because Crush Lime is boring.  This is a generic flavored lime beverage with no life to it.  This is something that you’d find when you need to scavenge for food right before a hurricane hits.  “I can’t believe I didn’t do this earlier.  Why isn’t there any bottled water left?!  Beef Jerky?  Yeah that’s a meat, we can eat that.  A gallon of sweet tea… sure the kids like sweet tea.  Generic lemon cookies?  Those go great with sweet tea!  What’s this?  Lime Crush?  I didn’t even know they made… ah heck I might as well grab it.”  You take it home and guzzle it down with your beef jerky and generic lemon cookies.  Never once do you think that it’s great or that it’s horrible.  You just drink it because it’s there.  If you like lime but don’t have access to Jarritos Lime or Stewarts Key Lime Soda, then I guess this would be ok.  Just know that you’re missing out on the superior product.

~A

Twist was oddly attracted to this can.

Black Lemonade

   Keeping with the nautical theme I decided to grab a bottle out of my fridge that has skull and crossbones on it.  It’s a short, stout bottle, a somewhat unique shape I rather like to hold when drinking a soda.  Adorned above the skull and crossbones are the words “Black Lemonade”.  That appears to be the name of the beverage and the coloring is indeed black, so let’s look a bit more closely shall we?  Around the skull there are humorous sayings like, “Animal testing was consentual”, “This may be your only way out”, “We want you for life”, and “Without a face, you’re just a bonehead”.  The bottle cap is definitely a keeper.  It’s a skeleton drinking a red soda but the soda is just pouring through his face.  Silly skeleton… soda is for the skin covered.  So from the label and bottle cap we can tell that the folks who make this have a sense of humor.  Hopefully they like good ingredients as well.  Oh neat they put the ingredients right on the bottle!  Who’d have thought!  Cane sugar, citric acid, lemon concentrate, lemon oil, some coloring, a bunch of crazy Ginseng, African Capsicum, Brazilian Guarana, Kola Nut, Skull Cap, and of course Sodium Benzoate.  Well aside from that last ingredient they seem to take their stuff pretty seriously.  Hopefully the taste reflects it.  Of course you know we can’t taste it until we smell it.

   Smells like lemonade… so no real surprise there.  I guess it doesn’t taste like fresh brewed lemonade but I’m ok with that since you can’t really expect anything  in a bottle to be freshly brewed.

   This tastes like liquid lemon/lime Twang to me.  For those who don’t know, Twang is a flavored salt that you can usually buy little packets of at your local gas station counter.  You definitely get the lemon flavoring you’d expect paired with an unexpectedly sour burst of flavor.  It’s not overly sour but you do get a nice(?) burn in the stomach from it.  Black Lemonade is not really that refreshing of a beverage, so there’s no need to replace all of your regular lemonade with this.  I know you were looking for a reason to replace all of your normal lemonade… sorry to get your hopes up.  It definitely leaves a lasting impression on your mouth as no portion of this drink is smooth.  Picture yourself driving a 1977 Gremlin without any shocks (I used a Gremlin in this example because the word itself is awesome.)  Now your yellow Gremlin is cruising down a cobblestone road… that’s when you first take a sip.  As your mouth takes note of what you just ingested your Gremlin is now reaching the end of the cobblestone road only to slide down a very rocky mountain… perhaps one of the Rocky Mountains.  Just as you think this rough ride is over you complete your sip of Black Lemonade.  With this completed sip your mouth and throat receive a harsh “Gremlin driving over landmines during an earthquake” feel.  Of course those are all exaggerated examples but truly this is one of the harshest beverages I’ve ever had the pleasure of tasting.  With that said I’m not sure I’d want to consume one everyday but that’s ok.  Soda isn’t meant for normal consumption… it’s a treat.  In this case though, the treat tricks you just a bit.  Oh joy I worked in a Halloween reference during the month of January. Topical!

~A

Twist has stared death in the face countless times.  Guess who keeps looking away.

Capt'n Eli's Root Beer

   I love good bottle art.  Bottle art is what I initially grade a soda on so it always confuses me when companies seem like they don’t care about it.  I’m not saying everything has to be “Wizard mural on the side of a van” epic but it at least needs to stand out amongst the others.  When I opened my fridge today to pick out a soda to review I wasn’t quite sure what to choose until I saw the bottle art on my current review.  Capt’n Eli’s Root Beer has a label that tells a story… not many other root beers can say that.   Actually I don’t believe that root beer can talk but that’s a debate for another time.

   What you see when you look at the label of Capt’n Eli’s Root Beer is a young child, which I will assume is Eli, rowing a boat out at sea.  The waves seem a bit choppy for such a young kid but don’t fear too much for him as a house is in sight over his right shoulder and growing ever closer.  Upon his left shoulder sits a parrot that I am now naming Murphy.  Murphy and Eli have been together about 2 years, and since parrots live such long lives you’ll be sure to see Murphy on Eli’s shoulder for several decades more.  Within the boat Eli is rowing sit 3 barrels.  I can only imagine that these barrels are filled with root beer.  I guess it could be rum, or oil, or tar, or unicorn blood, or even cream soda but since this is a bottle of root beer let’s stick with that.  So the story here to me is that Capt’n Eli (which I suspect is a title he gave himself) has a root beer route.  A root beer route is much like a paper route but the people on your route like you more since your product is delicious.  About two years ago on this root beer route Eli noticed that one of his barrels was leaking. He did all he could to plug up the hole but failed.  Shortly after he gave up a Scarlet Macaw flew down from a nearby tree and began drinking the spilled root beer.  Well it turns out that this bird took to liking the bubbly concoction and Eli.  Ever since that fateful day Murphy the parrot has ridden with Eli on his root beer route, always looking to sneak a sip whenever he can.  Oh the adventure they went on… but that’s for another day.

   Enough about those two, they have a business to run.  Let’s see what else we can find on this label.  Hey look ingredients and good ones at that.  Let’s see what we got here:  Water, Cane Sugar, Caramel Coloring, Natural & Artificial Flavors including Wintergreen Oil, Anise, Vanilla, Spices, Herbs, Citric Acid, and sadly Sodium Benzoate.  Wow, we were almost 100% great with those ingredients until we came upon ol’ Sodium Benzoate.  That list of ingredients reminded me a little bit of the ingredients you’d find in a Virgil’s Root Beer.  If they’re lucky then their flavor will be something close to it as well.  Let’s take a whiff.

   The first thing I notice is that you can really smell the wintergreen.  Capt’n Eli’s Root Beer has a very strong root beer aroma as well.  I think the word I’m trying to think of here is “rooty”.  Time to drink!

   Very nice, this ranks up there as one of the smoothest root beers I’ve ever tasted.  The carbonation is faint as far as root beer is concerned and the flavor mellows out a lot in its finish.  The middle portion of this beverage reminds me a little bit of root beer barrels candy.  Now normally I’d try and tell you which of the three main stream root beers this tasted like… Barq’s, A&W, or Mug.  For the first time ever I have to compare the flavor to that of Virgil’s.  Now I’m not saying it’s better than Virgil’s but I am saying that it should at least share a flavor comparison.  This shouldn’t come to you as a shock since they share a handful of ingredients that other root beers do not.  I do find it odd that I’m ending up with a bit of film in my mouth after each sip.  I didn’t think I would have this since it’s sweetened with cane sugar but there it is.  At least the film isn’t unpleasant.  With each lick of the top of my mouth I’m reminded of the root beer barrel candy flavoring again, although now it’s much fainter.  I’m noticing that as I reach the bottom of the bottle the wintergreen flavor increases.  This is a good thing in my opinion since it allows those of you who couldn’t taste the wintergreen another more obvious chance at it.  Overall this is a very good root beer.  It has a nice line up of ingredients, sans the Sodium Benzoate.  The flavor is above average and the labeling is fun.  I can only hope that other companies take notice of labels like this and begin to rethink their designs as well. 

~A

Twist's favorite flavor is parrot.

Seagram's Raspberry Ginger Ale

   I’m a lazy person by nature.  These two holiday weeks off were not planned… it was more along the lines of an excuse I made up.  With that said, I still procrastinated greatly to write my first review of the New Year.  I’m sure once I get back into a rhythm I’ll be good to go but this first one was pushed back 2 or 3 times.  I have a fridge full of new drinks but the soda picked for today’s review is seasonal so it goes before the rest.  What I have in front of me is Seagram’s Raspberry Ginger Ale, given to me by D-Dub.  Now, I love raspberry flavored things as I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned before.  I also have a joy for ginger.  I’m sure the last sentence can be taken many ways(several of them ringing true for me) but what I’m speaking of is ginger ale.  The side of the can does note that the raspberry flavoring inside is one of a natural origin.  Yay.  Reading the side of the can I notice that the green you would normally find adorning the aluminum of this can has been replaced with a much more festive raspberry pink.  Of course I noticed that way before I read the side of the can but I needed some sort of segue.  With the descriptive stuff out of the way we can now begin!

   As soon as I opened the can I heard a police siren outside.  Hopefully I’m not breaking some sort of federal law since I *insert funny here*.  The scent wafting from the mouth of the can is certainly that of raspberry.  The first thing I thought of when I inhaled it was that it reminded me of a scent you might find in a flavored water.  Hopefully Seagram’s Raspberry Ginger Ale has much more flavor than a bottle of Clearly Canadian.  I didn’t mean to name drop Clearly Canadian, it was just the first flavored water that came to mind.  On to the consumption!

Thought 1:  I like both regular ginger ale and green tea ginger ale better.

Thought 2:  While listed as natural the raspberry flavoring tastes a bit fake.

Thought 3:  The initial taste is good, the ride in the middle is ok but the finish has something to be desired. 

   Those are the first three thoughts that entered my head when I first consumed this.  The carbonation in this beverage is stronger than most but you don’t really feel that until after you swallow.  I hold raspberry flavored items to a very high level.  Remember when “Blue Raspberry” candy came out in the mid 90’s and everyone freaked out?  People were so very happy to have blue raspberry candy where it once was not.  Being a fan of raspberry I thought “how very odd for it to be blue… oh well let’s try this brand new blue raspberry SweetTart.”  Disappointment hit me hard in the face.  So while people were jumping off buildings out of the excitement that was new blue raspberry flavored candy, I sat home and cried for five straight years.  FIVE STRAIGHT YEARS!  That’s how hard I judge raspberry flavoring.  Now with that said I can at least tell that this is supposed to be raspberry flavored.  It’s just not what I would suggest a raspberry enthusiast try first thing after they woke up from a coma.  Finally, the HFCS really makes an impact on this beverage.  The finish of Seagram’s Raspberry Ginger Ale has a very sticky mouthfeel, much like Sprite.  This might be something they could fix if they sweetened with sugar instead.  Ah well… that’s just a crazy dream I suppose.  With all that said I did finish the drink and it wasn’t  that bad of an experience.  I just won’t be drinking one of these again anytime soon.

~A

The can is almost camouflaged on that fantastic maroon couch.  Twist is not.

Jelly Belly Juicy Pear

   Jelly Belly Jelly Bean Co. makes soda!  Who knew?  Apparently lots of people since this is sold at Walgreens.  As you might have guessed by the title of this article and the previous sentence, I have a Jelly Belly soda in front of me.  The particular flavor that’s gracing my palate today is Juicy Pear.  Now I don’t believe I’ve ever had a pear soda before so this could get rather dicey.  Ok, I’m not sure if “dicey” is the correct word but it was typed and I don’t feel like hitting the Backspace key that many times to correct my mistake.  The label is fairly simple in the fact that they use what looks like a clip-art pear combined with actual pictures of the Jelly Belly Juicy Pear jelly beans so that you won’t get confused as to what this flavor is based on.  The color is a vibrant pear-esque green which is very pleasing to the eye.  Time to take a whiff.

   Personally I can’t get a strong smell out of the top of this bottle but today I have enlisted the help of Ma Bla XL in reviewing this beverage.  I chose him to help for two reasons.   The first reason is that he’s here next to me so I figured I might as well get his opinion.  Reason number two is that he’s a candy affectionado.  The man knows his candy, making this seem like the perfect soda for him to help with.   Ma Bla XL is drinking his ration out of a styro-foam cup so he has a bit more surface area to work with when it comes to smell.  He believes that it smells exactly like Jelly Belly Juicy Pear jelly beans.  I’ll have to take his word on it.  Let’s move on.

   Yeesh.  The first thing I taste is a very chemically flavored pear.  It’s not the chemicals in the soda that produce this artificial taste, I really think that’s the flavor that they were going for and it’s just not agreeing with my taste buds.  It takes a while to meander your way through the chemical pear flavoring but once you do you’re not greeted with anything worth your journey.  There’s an appropriate amount of fizz but that’s not enough to save this soda in my opinion.  Ma Bla XL, on the other hand, says this tastes exactly like Jelly Belly Juicy Pear with a slight hint of burning.

~A

Ma Bla XL's take on Twist since he was not on hand

Henry Weinhard's Orange Cream

   Good ol’ Henry Weinhard is back in my grasp, except this time he’s the flavor of dreams…icles.  That’s right the same Henry Weinhard that makes Henry Weinhard’s Black Cherry Cream Soda also makes Henry Weinhard’s Orange Cream.  Who’d have guessed?!  The ingredients on the side say that this beverage has a “blend of select oranges, mandarins, and real vanilla”.  Well that’s good enough for me… oh wait.  The added “complexity and character” comes from “a blend of lemon, lime, Chinese ginger, nutmeg, lemon grass, and angelica root”.  This is some pretty fancy-dancy orange cream soda.  Way to many words, not enough drinking.  It’s time to move on

   The orange cream aroma is not a shy one.  Once I opened the bottle my nostrils were treated with a barrage of orange and vanilla.  Pretend its April Fools’ Day but you’re heading off to bed.  You’ve manage to go all day without getting tricked.  Sure enough before you head up the stairs your doorbell rings.  “Well who could that be?” you ask aloud, only to be answered by the meow of your cat.  You cry a little inside thinking of what might have happened if, JUST IF, you had talked to the girl at the gas pump.  Maybe you wouldn’t be so lonely.  Maybe Snugglepuff would like her new mommy for once.  Maybe you’re going a little crazy.  Opening the door you look around for who might have come calling for you.  The black night sky greets you, and nothing more.  “Heh,” you chuckle to yourself, “I guess I did get fooled after all.”  Before you can turn around you hear a rustling in your bushes.  You squint your eyes making out the faint outline of a man.  POW! A peeled orange hits you square on the nose; your nostrils now filled with the scurvy fighting juice.  Before you can react to the citrus onslaught, the guy that didn’t bring oranges runs up to you and rubs vanilla scented potpourri all over your face.  “THAT’S NOT EVEN A TRICK!” you yell into the night upon uncaring ears. 

   That is what I imagined when I first opened this bottle.  I never do my pointless rants during the smell portion of the review, so I figured I’d mix it up a little.  Anyway, I should probably drink this now.

   This, my fellow jerks, is excellent orange cream soda.  The orange has the citrus tart you want to find in an orange soda but there’s a bonus this time that your normal orange soda doesn’t have.  As long as you swish this around you don’t lose the great orange flavor, which would be a good flavor for a soda all by itself.  The moment you stop the smooth vanilla begins to dissipate the once tart orange.  Eventually the orange is overtaken by the vanilla giving Henry Weinhard’s Orange Cream a delightfully smooth finish.  The mouth feel changes so much from initial sip to finish I’m a little bit amazed.  The aftertaste you’re left with is that of the smooth vanilla, the orange is almost nowhere to be found until you burp.  I know that’s a bit crass, but the duality of this beverage is very unique.  To be honest with you I was a little hesitant to try this because I was slightly let down by the black cherry cream soda.  Henry Weinhard did not disappoint this go around though.  This is honestly the best orange cream soda I’ve had to date.

~A

You can almost see the resemblance

Colombiana

   Dan W. gave me this very exotically named drink that I will be reviewing today.  The name of the beverage at hand today is Colombiana, so I could be taking a trip to Mexico, Brazil, Chile, or so many other fanciful places.  Let’s see what the side of the can says.  Looks like that it was bottled by the find folks at Brooklyn Bottling of Milton, NY.  Oh, how very exotic!  This is defined on the can as a Kola Flavored Soda… which I can only assume is flavored like kola champagne (similar to cream soda).  The can is brightly colored with everyone’s favorite primary colors.  Accompanying the name of the soda are two phrases in Spanish.  “La que tomamos en casa”, which according to Google roughly translates into “The one you take home.”   The other phrase is “la nuestra”, which again according to Google translates into “ours”.   Sadly the ingredients aren’t nearly as interesting.  They are just a collection of chemicals that make up this sugary drink.  Alright, it’s time to stop reading… me, not you.  I’m going to stop reading the can while you continue to read this review. 

   Yup, this smells like Big Red/Cream Soda/Kola Champagne.  If Colombiana has half the following that Inca Kola does then I’m probably in for a barrage (2 people) of criticism.  Let’s take a sip shall we?

   While you might think of cream soda when you first try this, if you study it for just a moment you’ll find you’re just enough off base to be called out.  The flavor starts off like a lighter version of Big Red with the slightest of hints of tea.  The fizz Colombiana hits you with has more of a punch than a cream soda, and that sets it apart from your basic Kola Champagne.  What you’re left with after drinking this is a lighter version of the flavor you started with.  To put that into a more comprehendible sentence:  The aftertaste is true to the taste.  To be honest I liked this more than your typical kola champagne but it still tastes like your basic sugary drink to me.  There is nothing that truly sets Colombiana apart from the soda herd.  So, if you see a red, yellow, and blue can that catches your eye, then give it a go.  If not, then don’t go crazy looking for it.

~A

The eagle and Twist had a staring contest.  Do you need to even ask who won?

Jarritos Toronja

   Again we dip from the Jarritos well of flavors, this time pulling out Toronja (which is Spanish for grapefruit).  Now early on in my soda reviewing timeline I thought I didn’t like grapefruit soda thanks to childhood memories I had of Fresca.  Thankfully the fine folks at Oogave made a delicious grapefruit soda that removed any thought in my brain that grapefruit couldn’t be good.  I don’t know if grapefruit is a newer flavor with Jarritos but the bottle art on the side seems much more modern and eye catching than their normal bottle art.  I like it!  Enough of the jibbering and the jabbering… let’s open this up.

   As you might think upon smelling this beverage you get the scent of citrus… a centrus if you will.  Grapefruit isn’t really known for its powerful aroma so I’m not too worried about the light amount of centrus.  We could huff this all day and not really find anything else out, so let’s try drinking it instead.

   These are literally the first words that popped in my head after the first drink:  Sprite. No, not Sprite.  Grapefruit.  Nice. Fizzy.    Now I normally have more complicated thoughts than that, but for some reason my brain decided to simplify the review process.  Just think, you now have an insider’s look into what this article is being built around.  I guess I could break down the words for you so that it doesn’t seem like I have no ability to elaborate.  “Sprite,” means just that.  My initial reaction was “wow this tastes a lot like Sprite when you first drink it.  “No, not Sprite,” was my brain pulling back the first thought and telling me “wait… this isn’t what you thought it was.”  “Grapefruit,” is obviously what I began to taste as this point in the consumption.  “Nice,” was how pleasant the grapefruit flavor was to my palette.  “Fizzy,” was the barrage of bubble I received on my tongue after I had completed the first sip.  Now all of that happened in about 3 seconds time, so if you feel like doing the math to figure out how long each thought lasted more power to you.  Jarritos Toronja is a very light beverage which allows it to be refreshing as well as tasty.  You could make a friend easily by giving this to someone who’s working outside, sweating, and looking generally miserable.  With that said you’d need more than one so that you could enjoy it as well.

~A

Note: This soda was given to us by Jarritos.

Twist was triple dog dared to lick this ice cold bottle.