Goslings Ginger Beer

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I’ve seen a lot of mascots on labels before, but never a seal until today.  Goslings Ginger Beer has a drawing of a seal on it’s label.  The seal has a life preserver around its neck with the word “Stormy” on it. This allows me to assume that it’s name is Stormy the Seal which is a perfectly acceptable name for a seal.

Stormy sits on the words “Ginger Beer” and underneath that “The refreshing zip of ginger”.  Now ginger is a lot of things, but “refreshing” was never something I’d attribute to it.  

A seal, a hippo, and an iguana review a soda...

Ingredients wise this is comprised of carbonated water, HFCS, natural ginger beer flavor, citric acid, gum acacia, and ester gum.  Which one of those ingredients bothers you the most?  If it’s not “natural ginger beer flavor” then I’m questioning your questioning ability.

What is “natural ginger beer flavor”?  It’s clearly not “ginger” because I believe they’d have put “ginger” on the label.  Can you find “natural ginger beer flavor” in the wild?  Did they make a ginger beer through natural methods then steal it of its flavor? Isn’t a ginger beer one part carbonation and one part natural ginger beer flavor?  SO MANY QUESTIONS!  Enough questions, it’s time to drink.

Goslings Ginger Beer has the lightest of scents.  The little bit of aroma I can discern is more citrus than ginger.  HOLD THE PHONE.  This is the Official Ginger Beer of the 35th America’s Cup.  How did I not see this?  This better be fan-freaking-tastic if it’s the official anything of anything.

After the first sip my concern has cooled a bit.  Goslings Ginger Beer may have ridiculous ingredients and be an official something of something, but it’s better than I thought it’d be.  The mouthfeel is cool, crisp and refreshing at first.  This experience transforms smoothly into the ginger burn you’d expect with a ginger beer.  It’s a strong burn, but not overly so.  Strong enough that I’m enjoying the pain, but not so much that it’s keeping me from wanting to go back.

On the downside, I am noticing the more I drink this the more the cracks are starting to show.  What started off as cool and refreshing is being replace with metallic and medicinal.  The burn is unchanged, but overall Goslings Ginger Beer does not build upon itself well.  Odd how an experience can change so quickly.

So there you have it, Goslings Ginger Beer starts off well, but ultimately doesn’t meet the mark set by many of the ginger beers before it.

~A

This was purchased at an HEB grocer

MTN Dew Baja Blast

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I don’t even know what to call Mountain Dew anymore.  Is it “Mtn Dew”, “mtn dew”, “MTN DEW”, or are we supposed to pretend the can still says “Mountain Dew”?  Either way my fridge was running low on soda to review so I grabbed a can of MTN Dew (my personal interpretation of what’s right) Baja Blast.  

Baja is one of Twist's many middle names

For some reason my brain thought it’d be best if I chose the 24oz can.  I have no idea why I thought that much MTN Dew would be appropriate for me, but here we are.  For those not in the know MTN Dew Baja Blast was a flavor that was only found at Taco Bell for the longest times.  Then a few months back they released it into the wild for a limited time.  MTN Dew fans went nuts.  At the time it happened I took notice and probably thought, “I should pick up a really giant can of that one day for review”.  Well now you’re here reading that review that was thought of so long ago.

Look on the side of most any mainstream soda and you’ll get the same ingredients as Baja Blast.  It’s a combo of caffeine, HFCS, Artificial/Natural Flavors, chemicals, and colors.  Ultimately it’s supposed to embody a “tropical lime flavor” according to the can.  Hopefully they’re right.

Well it smells like lime MTN Dew so I can’t be too angry at that.  Even though I just started walking the trail I’m quite pleased with the scenery.

Wow, this might be a top three MTN Dew flavor for me.  It does have an oddly smooth and candy like lime taste, but it doesn’t seem overly sweet to me.  The well known original MTN Dew flavor is hidden behind the foliage of the lime, making the journey feel safe.  This isn’t the dangerous Code Red (my favorite MTN Dew flavor), but it’s different enough to feel new.  

I’ll be honest, I opened this comically large can thinking I’d dislike this flavor.  MTN Dew is hit or miss for me and I fully expected this to whiff.  It’s amazing this soda doesn’t taste like crow.  It doesn’t have a heavy syrup feel to it, the carbonation isn’t overly strong, the flavor isn’t overpowering.  It’s a really easy soda to drink.  As with most things there are a few negatives.

First off the taste builds on itself a little awkwardly.  It’s like my tastebuds are anticipating each sip now so the initial tastes are more enjoyable than the later ones.  There is a bit of an aftertaste as well.  It’s not unpleasant, but it doesn’t fall into the category of good either.  While it does taste different from original MTN Dew it’s still a fairly safe alteration of it.  That’s not a huge knock against it, but I do wish the lime flavor could be featured a bit more prominantly.

So there you have it, a handful of good things and a couple bad, some of which might be nit picky.  All in all though I enjoyed my time with Baja Blast.  Code Red and Original Dew are still one and two, but at least now I have a solid three.  So here’s to knowing my top three Dew flavors and to MTN Dew for always taking chances.

~A

This can was purchased at good ol’ Wal-Mart

Sprite LeBron’s Mix

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There are two entities on this earth I trust to make a delicious special edition soda, the video game industry and basketball players.  Fortunately today’s entry is from the latter.  Sprite LeBron’s Mix is basketball’s own LeBron James’ own personal mix of Sprite.  I didn’t catch any commercials for this, but I picture him in a lab coat with goggles holding test tubes or something at the Sprite laboratories.  

Twist also took his talents to Miami before returning home. He was arrested.

All of that potentially imagined lab work resulted in a “Lemon-Lime Soda” that is “Natural cherry and orange flavored with other natural flavors”.  The word natural is so nice they worked it in twice.  Let’s see what else is in the bottle.  Carbonated water, high fructose corn syrup, citric acid, sodium citrate, and a dash of sodium benzoate for luck.  Man, LeBron really knows his stuff.  If only Hotlips or Swamp Pop had gotten a hold of his soda making prowess.  Enough chit chat, time for reviewing.

Immediately this smells better than regular Sprite.  The orange aroma jumps out immediately and attacks the ol’ olfactory gland.   I’m having a harder time finding the cherry.  Hey!  You in the back with the sophomoric mind.  Quit snickering.  Anywho, I’m having a harder time finding the cherry, but hopefully it’ll be there in taste.  Let’s find out.

Oddly enough I taste more of the cherry than I do the orange.  Both of these tastes, as natural as they may be, seem artificial to me though.  That’s not to say this isn’t good.  Sprite LeBron’s Mix is better than original Sprite yet worse than Sprite Remix.  Of course there are a lot of sodas worse than Sprite Remix.  The guy that gave this to me said he felt it tasted like Surge cut with Sprite.  I can definitely see where he came to that conclusion, but I’d need to taste more orange to completely agree.  

The carbonation level seems to be on par with Sprite, perhaps a little too carbonated.  The syrupy mouthfeel of Sprite is lessened to some degree, which is nice.  All in all though this tastes like cherry Sprite with some orange and smells like orange sprite with some cherry.  The more I drink it though the less natural it tastes so I’m going to stop now.

~A

This soda was given to me by Wrastlin’ Jakito

Quinabeer

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George Prince flexes his impressive biceps on a can of Quinabeer.  I don’t know who George Prince is though.  My brief search led me to more picture of the young Prince George than I cared to look at.  Quinabeer is made by Cawy and other than having a “body builder” on it’s label it resides in a red can.  Now Coca Cola has done a pretty fantastic job of making me associate red and white cans with Coke, so I immediately assume that Quinabeer is a sort of cola.  It probably isn’t, but that’s what 32 years of marketing has done to my brain.  Let’s find out what it really tastes like, together.  Except for those of you who already know.  You be quiet.

George Prince once claimed a victory over Twist. Perhaps this is why you've never heard of him.

Well this smells like orange soda.  I no longer have any clue regarding Quinabeer.  The scent did make me salivate though, so good on them.

If Big Red had orange flavoring it would taste like this.  A coupling of orange and bubble gum, Quinabeer is truly unlike anything I’ve tried to date and that’s getting harder and harder to do.   Both of these flavors have equal billing in the program and neither outshines the other.  This balance is met with a rather raucous carbonation that sizzles at the end of each sip.  I’m usually not a fan of bubble gum flavored sodas, but the citrus cuts into it enough that I can forgive it.

Now for the bad.  Quinabeer leaves a very syrupy feel in my mouth.  Its flavor just kind of hangs about like a kid who graduated still lurking around his high school.  Sure, maybe he was a great guy when he was a senior, but now it’s just kind of creepy and you wish he’d go away.

Creepy guy aside, Quinabeer does have a combination like I’ve never seen but the flavors involved are just alright.  I’m not going to tell my friends that I tried Quinabeer.  Don’t get me wrong, I consider all of you my friends… but you understand… right?  The fact that the entire time I typed this paragraph my mouth was occupied by the syrupy ghost of George Prince has me questioning my initial ranking.  Ah well, better luck next time.

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market


Cawy Lemon Lime

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Welcome to “Plain-cans-ville”.  This can of Cawy Lemon Lime, much like it’s Watermelon soda, looks like something you’d see in a sitcom vending machine.  It’s made by Cawy and the flavor is lemon lime.  That’s all the label wants you to know.  Oh, and there’s some snowflakes of some sort as well… perhaps they’re stars.  Who knows?  

If I judged books by their covers I’d say this is going to be insanely generic although I’m happy to see the ingredients include extract of lemon and lime oils.  Perhaps this one ingredient will push this from generic to recomendable.  That’s quite the important leap in rating.  Let’s find out together shall we, as we always do… because we’re a team you and I.

A stronger than expected lemon lime scent (heavier on the lemon) pops out of the mouth of the can.  Aside from being strong the aroma itself is nothing special.  I’m ok with “regular aromas” though because they’re more likely to lead to average or good drinks than they are bad.  Either my expectations will be met or they’ll be exceeded.  C’mon, buddy.  Let’s you and me find out together.  Team us!

You're a syrupy aftertaste!  No, you are!

Two things.  Thing one is the fact that this is more lime based in terms of flavor than it is lemon.  Does that make it a Lime Lemon drink?  Thing two is the fact that there’s something off about the taste of this, but i can’t put my finger on it.  Perhaps “Thing two” will go away the more I consume as my palette gets used to the flavor.  

Cawy Lemon Lime does have a decent amount of flavor to it.  Thankfully this flavor is pretty good and in my opinion better than Sprite, but not quite as good as 7Up if we’re going to compare.  The lime taste I’m getting is fairly sweet and candy like while the lemon seems to be on par with other limon sodas.

As I hoped “Thing two” is pretty much fading away although I think I figured it out.  Some drinks have syrupy aftertastes that linger after each sip.  Cawy Lemon Lime gives you this experience right off the bat.  The first thing I taste is that syrupy aftertaste and it lingers throughout the entire duration of my sip.  On the plus side the more I drink the less I notice it as it builds upon itself to the point where everything tastes kind of syrupy candy limey.  That’s the kind of review you get here folks.  What does Cawy Lemon Lime taste like?  Well it’s kind of syrupy candy limey.  Good night, everybody!

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market

Cawy Watermelon

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This can of soda looks like something you’d see on a television show.  Like a bag of “Let’s Potato Chips” it just looks incredibly fake.  The word “Watermelon” is emblazoned at the top of the can with a country bumpkin kid below enjoying the worlds largest piece of watermelon.  Only after searching the can for a bit do I see that it’s made by Cawy.  Cawy was an international brand founded in Cuba, but is now headquartered in Miami, Florida.  

A scroll with French words on it label one side of the can while what can only be assumed to be the English translation occupy the other side.  “Soda, Naturally and Artificially Flavored” it says.  Let’s run the other side through Google Translate and see what we get.  “Soda flavored with watermelon.”  That’s not quite the same thing at all.  In fact according to the ingredients it’s a straight up lie.  Natural flavors aren’t even a listed ingredient.  This Cawy Watermelon is getting shadier by the second.  Better open it up before I learn too much.

Twist is crying.  You just can't tell.

Ok, so it smells like watermelon and a little bit of cantaloupe.  In case you’re not aware, I’m under the belief that cantaloupe was created by the devil.  Why else would it taste so foul?  Clearly Satan made it to trick people into eating it.  Every fruit it touches it ruins.  It’s truly an evil fruit.  With that said I really don’t want to drink this.

I have no idea what this even tastes like.  It’s not “projectile vomit” bad, but I’m almost certain I won’t be finishing this can.  A sickly sweet watermelon(?) taste oozes over the entirety of my mouth.  Even my lips are subjected to this interesting flavor.  When I’m not tasting watermelon(?) I’m tasting bubble gum and I’m pretty sure I shouldn’t be.  The mingling of the two flavors results in the birth of a sugary medicinal baby.  Quite similar to Amoxicillin, but add a terrible watermelon(?) taste to the mix.

I think I’m going to stop now.  Don’t get me wrong there is a very brief upside to this soda.  Remember?  It’s not “projectile vomit” bad.  This baby doesn’t taste very good.  At the right angles he’s cute, but once you really get to know him you’ll be happy you never had kids...or if you did have kids they grew up and became root beer or cola.  You know, something respectable.

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market

Nesbitt's Honey Lemonade

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I like lemonade.  Who doesn’t?  Don’t answer that because I would judge you harshly.  I also like soda.  Who doesn’t?  None of you because you’re reading this site.  I seriously doubt my prose are impressive enough to pull people (if you can call them that) that hate soda.  So since I like both lemonade and soda you know I love it when a carbonated lemonade finds its way in front of me.  Today that beverage is called Nesbitt’s Honey Lemonade and their logo is fantastic!  It’s the kind of logo I would proudly wear.  A circular logo that half lemon and half honey comb.  Genius!  

Twist is disappointed, but you didn't hear it from me.

Looking at the ingredients I see this is sadly sweetened with HFCS, but also includes honey!  It’s listed right there next to Yellow #5 so you know it must be an important ingredient.  Yellow #5 and Honey working together as they always should.  OK, so I wish this was a little more natural of a drink.  Perhaps the flavor will make me forget my wish.

Impressively enough the aroma that comes off the bottle is indeed a mixture of lemon and honey.  The honey rides in on the tart scent of the lemon.  He’s waving wildly to make sure I notice him and see the neat trick he’s doing, but I knew he was there from aroma alone.

That is the finest (in the minimal sense) carbonation level I think I’ve ever encountered.  Such a miniscule amount of fizz, barely enough to even register as a mouth feel.  Like a feather tickling an elephant it is.  I understand they didn’t want to take away from the fact that it’s a lemonade, but c’mon.

As for the flavor I see why the honey was trying to get my attention earlier.  If I didn’t know about him it would be easy to just think this was a sweet lemonade.  Thankfully he waved at me so I can appreciate the mild honey flavor I get with every sip.  Average is how I would rate the lemonade portion of this soda.  It’s not all that flavorful and you could replicate it by purchasing numerous other products.  

Now that I’m at the bottom of the bottle I’m finding that the honey flavor stacks on itself a little bit.  It’s not enough for me to rethink the rating of this beverage, but it’s a neat thing to look forward too.  All in all this is a fun concept that ended up being a passable soda.

~A

Dr. Brown's Original Cream Soda

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So I just looked over our database of sodas (588 at the writing of this review) and I’ve never reviewed anything from Dr. Brown.  I see it most everywhere I go, yet I’ve yet to pick up a bottle.  Had I known that I would have picked up their root beer, but I suppose Dr. Brown’s Original Cream Soda will be a fine first taste as well.  I’m sure in that assessment because the bottle clearly says that it’s a “Flavor Favorite for Generations”.  Who am I to turn down a generational flavor favorite?  Heck, the label has the statue of liberty on it.  I’m not really sure how that works into the brand, but I’ll go with it.  Ok, so I had to look it up.  Apparently Dr. Brown’s soda originated in New York.  Amazing how things make sense like that.

Looking at the ingredients I see that this is sweetened with sugar and/or high fructose corn syrup.  I really wish they would just pick one and keep us from guessing, but the bevy of chemical listed afterwards makes me care a little less.

Twist has 14 different doctorates.  12 are legit.

It smells like a rich and creamy cream soda.  Sugary, smooth, and full of sweet smells.  I have a feeling this is going to be an above average cream soda with a powerful taste full of sucrose.

Interesting, the flavor is lighter than I imagined.  Here I was fully ready to be drowning in cream soda syrup and I’m greeting with a well balanced cream soda that doesn’t weigh heavily within my mouth.  It’s not very often a cream soda has a mouth feel like this, so I must credit them for a soda that “feels good” to drink.

The flavor, while not as powerful as I suspected, still shines brightly enough for me to enjoy the typical cream soda taste.  This is helped out by a carbonation level that mostly stays out of the way allowing the flavor to present itself the best it can.  

Ultimately though Dr. Brown’s Original Cream Soda is good.  I personally like a smoother feel in my cream soda, but as I said before I appreciate the variety that this brings to the soda world.  I’d drink this again if offered, but I don’t see myself buying multiples since I could just as easily enjoy an A&W Cream Soda instead.

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market

Hello Kitty Ramune Strawberry Soda

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Ramune is a Japanese soda that incorporates a marble in the sealing of the beverage.  Hello Kitty is Hello Kitty.  If you combine the two you’re a giant robot away from a Japanese cliche trifecta.  Since I don’t have my own mech I’ll just review this Hello Kitty Ramune Strawberry Soda instead.  The label is very pink with Hello Kitty prominantly featured.  It seems she either has strawberries balanced on her head or they’re supposed to be some sort of bow.  Let’s go with the bow angle.  Oh, this soda is totally chemical...but it’s also Hello Kitty.

One day I’ll be good at these marble openings.  Today was not the day.  Once the marble was removed a burst of strawberry candy aroma hit my nose.  I kind of figured it’d be super sugary, but it’s also Hello Kitty.

Twist is a rejected Sanrio character.

Wow, the carbonation level of Hello Kitty Ramune Strawberry Soda is much higher than I initially expected.  This higher level of fizz cuts the flavor enough to not make it taste like a syrupy mess.  The soda itself is right below the “too sugary” mark that I’ve made up on some imaginary sugar ruler.  You know what this tastes like?  It tastes like you ordered a Strawberry Fanta from some fast food place and their soda fountain has the CO2 and syrup levels wrong.  

I’m finding out that there are times that strawberry soda needs to taste like a syrupy mess and this is one of them.  I want my mouth to be candy coated in strawberry syrup.  I want the aftertaste to linger longer than it should.  I feel like I’m drinking half of a strawberry soda.

What’s somewhat unfair about all this is that I wouldn’t rate this any higher if I got my wishes that I listed above.  No matter how you cut it this has a very generic flavor, like a lot of Ramune, and it just doesn’t stand out...but it also has Hello Kitty.

~A

This soda was purchased at World Market


Surge

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A mere four ounces assures me that I’m not dreaming.  The label is exactly as I remember it over 15 years ago, but there’s a 16 where the 12 should be.  That difference of four tells me that I live in a reality in which you can buy Surge.  That’s right Carbo-Nation, if you haven’t heard you can buy Surge once more.  Brought to life in 1997 and put to sleep in 2003 Surge has been given breath.  It’s currently exclusive to Amazon as of this review.  When I found out I shrieked in excitement and purchase a 12 pack simultaneously.  Surge was one of the first sodas I NEEDED to drink.  All of the Coke and Pepsi memories of my childhood blend together into a mush.  Surge is attached to a handful of memories I can still recall.  

There was a time that I enjoyed pairing Surge with powdered donuts.  Sadly I do not have such donuts in front of me now, but I will pair them once again.  I don’t know why I liked this pairing, but it worked like gangbusters...although I’m guessing most people don’t even know what gangbusters is.  

Mark one off the bucket list for Twist

No matter how I try to downplay it I know I’ve already over hyped this beverage in my mind.  They got me.  Coke got me right by the childhood.  That sounded more illegal than I intended it to.  It’s 1:30 in the morning and I’m exhausted, but I must review this caffineated beverage for 15 year old Aaron.  He has minimal worries.  He doesn’t hold a job, have a kid, or make payments on a house.  15 year old Aaron stays up late and plays video games.  Let’s raise a glass to 15 year old Aaron!

The orange and lime scent rush past my nostrils.  32 year old Aaron has a feeling that Surge tasted really generic all those years ago, but 15 year old Aaron doesn’t care.  He and his friends drank this buy the case.  32 year old Aaron is pretty sure that his younger self just fell into the media trap that Coke created.  15 year old Aaron couldn’t care less and takes a swig.

32 year old Aaron goes to bed because he knows that 15 year old Aaron has won.  The first sip brings back a wash of memories.  Old man Aaron thought this would taste generic, but he was wrong.  It tastes like Surge.  The bursts of orange and lime combine to create a insanely refreshing soda.  Lime eventually wins out, which is how it should be for any drink that contains lime.  

Carbonation levels are just fine.  The bubbles are fierce but small, packing an excellent amount of punch to the tongue and throat.  Oddly they are only felt near the finish of the beverage which creates a nice duality in terms of mouth feel.  I really need to stop drinking this because it’ll probably keep me up all… SHUT UP OLD MAN AND DRINK YOUR SURGE..ok.

Surprisingly, Surge isn’t nearly as syrupy as I thought it would be.  There is of course somewhat of a syrupy mouthfeel, but it’s less that you’d experience with a Sprite.  The finish is the glaring weak point to this beverage.  The aforementioned syrupy feel combined with the dying lime and orange flavors create a sadness in my mouth.  What goes in with a party finishes with a whimper.  Leaving with a whine isn’t something a soda called Surge should do.  

Turning off the nostalgia for a moment, Surge really impressed me in terms of flavors and feel.  It played to one of my favorite tastes, lime, and it kept the same sensations going throughout all 16 ounces.  Honestly, if I could change one thing about this re-release it would be the can.  I wish they’d put it in 12 ounce cans, but 15 year old Aaron has never seen a 16 ounce can so he’s pretty ecstatic.

~A

This soda was purchased off of Amazon.com

Jeff's Vanilla Soda

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Twist is anything but vanilla.  Still, he's impressed... can't you tell?

The best bottled chocolate soda I’ve ever had was Jeff’s Chocolate Soda.  Imagine the glee on my face when I found Jeff’s Vanilla Soda at my local World Market.  Now reduce that glee about 10% because I prefer chocolate to vanilla.  Jeff’s Vanilla Soda, much like its brethren, is unique in the fact that it’s made with milk.  Ingredients three and four are milk and cream so I’m guessing this is going to be a fairly smooth beverage.  It’s also 97% fat free in case you were worried about that sort of thing.  


Upon opening I’m greeted with the aroma of vanilla extract.  It’s quite the pleasant yet pungent scent that just entices me to consume it immediately.  So I think I’ll do just that.

Son of a gun that’s good.  It’s like carbonated vanilla ice cream that melted in your fridge.  So incredibly rich and creamy, there’s really nothing like it that I’ve found on the market.  Jeff’s Vanilla Soda is a bit thicker than your standard sodas, but this of course is due to the milk and cream used in its creation.  This thickness may be a bit odd for you upon taking your first swig.  You should keep drinking it because in no time you’ll get used to the mouth feel and truly begin to appreciate what you’re drinking.  

The carbonation levels are also lower than what you might expect, but in this case it just enhances the smooth, smooth, deliciousness that is Jeff’s Vanilla Soda.  I do think they could be a little stronger without losing any of the other aspects of the soda.  It would also allow it to feel a little bit lighter while having a fun mouth feel.

If you’re a fan of cream soda this needs to be in your hand right now.  It may be too heavy for you, but you’d be doing yourself a disservice if you didn’t even try it.  Prior to beginning this review I didn’t think there would be any way the vanilla soda would meet the excellence of the chocolate.  I was wrong.  It matches it turn for turn while being a completely different experience.

~A


Pennsylvania Dutch Birch Beer

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Mike is from Pennsylvania where birch beer is prevalent.  For whatever reason he hates birch beer.  Personally I find it odd that someone who likes root beer could hate birch beer, but I’m sure I have my quirks as well.  Today’s soda hails from Mike’s home state and is called Pennsylvania Dutch Birch Beer.

Twist can raise a barn... with his mind.

Now the good folks at Pennsylvania Dutch sent me a 12 pack for my review.  As I do with all of my extra sodas I gave it away to my friends.  Let me tell you, Pennsylvania Dutch Birch Beer went faster than any other soda I’d given away.  In fact one of the guys that got a bottle was a Pennsylvania native as well and had been missing his fix.

The bottle design harkens back to olden times with horse drawn carriages.  Now there is a heavy Amish population in Pennsylvania, so I guess the image could be modern too.  A ribbon at the bottom states that this is “Made From An Old Pennsylvania Dutch Recipe”.  I enjoy statements like that.  They’re always so full of hope until you check the ingredients.  Let’s see what creates this time tested flavor of olde.  Carbonated water, high fructose corn syrup, caramel color, salt, natural and artificial flavors, gum acacia, and red #40.  Yup, their story checks out.  That ingredient list reads as if it were pulled from the 1800’s themselves.  Sigh.

It never makes sense to me to hide natural ingredients.  Sure, hide all the chemicals you want in your vague “artificial ingredients” tag, but if they’re natural I’d really like to know what they are.  Alright, enough complaining.  It’s time I moved on.

The pungent rooty aroma bursts from the mouth of the bottle.  It’s mostly comprised of black licorice and root beer, but a vanilla tingle is lingering at the end of each sniff.  

Old Pennsylvania Dutch Recipe or not, that is darn tasty.  The amount of vanilla in this creates a very smooth mouth feel while your taste buds are simultaneously battling the slight licorice taste you’d expect in a birch beer.  The carbonation plays both sides of the field as it first compliments the smooth texture with soft, tiny bubbles.  When the end of the sip draws near and the birch beer begins to bite the carbonation rises up and becomes sharp.  It’s quite the fortunate battle happening in my mouth.  

All in all Pennsylvania Dutch Birch Beer was a really pleasant experience.  I do wish they used cane sugar and told us what the “natural ingredients” were.  Still quite tasty and I’m having a hard time rating it.  I think I’m going to go with “Buy a Pack”, but know it’s on the high end of that scale.  Better break back out the decimals points (NEVER AGAIN).

~A

This soda was supplied to us by Pennsylvania Dutch

Flathead Lake Huckleberry

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Huckleberry Finn is a literary classic.  My mother used to have a very old edition of said book and in junior high I took it to school with me and tossed it in the bottom of my locker.  It sat there, books piling upon it, tearing the spine off painfully slow.  I brought it home and my mother was understandably angry.  Well, at the time I didn’t understand because it was just a book.  You could buy Huckleberry Finn at the store for $5. 

Twist could mess up the Flathead Lake mascot

This has nothing to do with the soda I’m about to drink, I just wanted to get that off my chest.  I still feel bad for ruining that book.  Flathead Lake Huckleberry (there’s the tie in) Soda probably isn’t going to be as good as the words Mark Twain penned.  If the taste equals his excellence in writing then I’ll shut down the website.  I seriously doubt that will happen though because Flathead Lake usually tastes off to me.  I like the story they tell, but the ending makes me not care if I hear it again.  There ingredients are an assortment of chemicals and it’s quite obvious when you take a sip.  Then again, I haven’t had their huckleberry.  For the record I’m YOUR huckleberry and I’m ready to review this.

A grape aroma surrounded by candy flies out of the bottle.  The scent is not solely grape, but that’s definitely the smell in charge.  The tart huckleberry taste can be felt within my nostrils as I take deeper and deeper whiffs.  Here’s hoping this above average smell isn’t a sugary mess in the taste department.

For having such a powerful aroma the taste is actually quite weak.  Flathead Lake Huckleberry is a watery grape soda with whispers of flavor from a similar fruit.  The carbonation is sharp and fizzy, but not enough to have me anxiously anticipating my next sip.  Even if this did have a more powerful taste I’m not sure it’d be enough to change the rating I’m already leaning towards.  It’s tasty enough, but even if you’re really into huckleberries I just don’t see this being your soda of choice.  The flavors are muted, confused, and seem thrown together for the sake of being “not just a grape soda”.  “This is huckleberry dang-it and people will notice us more because it’s not your standard flavor.”  This is true.  When I saw the flavor of this soda was huckleberry I became excited because it wasn’t a flavor I was used to.  I can count on one hand the number of huckleberry sodas I’ve had.  So Flathead Lake got me, but didn’t deliver on the flavor.  Add this to the fact that my mouth is coated with a thin layer of “huckleberry” syrup and it’s really not that enjoyable of an experience. 

No, it’s not a gross soda, but it’s not hard to make “not a gross soda”.  I’ve done it, but it’s nothing I’d bottle and sell.  Flathead Lake made one too, but instead of using huckleberry they used “artificial flavors” and called it a day.  Again, it’s not gross so I won’t tell you to beware.  It’s just so average.

~A

Filbert's Strawberry

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As many of you know I’m not the biggest fan of strawberry soda.  Far too often it’s just a conglomeration of sugar, chemicals, and bubbles.  So when I pulled Filbert’s Strawberry soda out of my fridge I probably voiced an audible sigh.  While the rich red coloring and the barrel full of soda on the label are nice, I’m just not in the mood for another sugar filled strawberry soda.  I was hoping that the inclusion of pure sugar in the ingredients would make me a little happier about reviewing this, but Filbert’s is made with “sugar and/or corn sweetner”.  That’s “sweetner” without the “e”.  Other such ingredients in this self-proclaimed “Old Time Quality” soda are as follows:  Carbonated water, citric acid, artificial flavor & color, and of course sodium benzoate.  No matter how good this soda is, they’ve already hit one of my nerves.  Don’t say your beverage has an “Old Time Quality” when your ingredient list is that sad.  At least the bottle cap is nice.

A strawberry scent so sweet it could be cotton candy oozes carefully out of the mouth of the bottle.  I am happy that the scent wasn’t so powerful I could smell it from a distance.  Hopefully this means it’s not quite as sugary as I perceived it to be.

Twist's middle name is Filbert.  No relation.

That is a rather odd strawberry soda.  Let me start off by saying that this isn’t a sugary mess.  Yes it’s sweet, but thankfully someone showed some restraint and pulled back what could have been Candyland.  Each sip doesn’t start off tasting like strawberry; in fact the first half of my sip doesn’t taste like much at all.  As soon as I agitate the liquid, either by swishing or swallowing, I’m welcomed with a smattering of strawberry that seems to identify a little bit with a strawberry-cream.  Even though there is a touch of cream flavoring in each gulp the end of my sips trail off into a chemical heap.  This artificial ending begins to even taste a little like a diet strawberry soda before turning into an unfortunate memory.

The fruit flavor of Filbert’s Strawberry is unmistakably recognized, but it’s not nearly as powerful as I thought it would be.  If they were to boost the flavor just a bit I think they could improve their product.  As it stands now, Filbert’s Strawberry is pleasantly different, but nothing I’d force people to drink. 

~A

Strawberry Shasta

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Here’s something odd, well at least I find it odd.  I’ve never had a Shasta soda that I can remember.  It’s Shasta!  How have I lived 31 years and never had one.  The mascot of one of our local universities is named Shasta, yet trying the drink has eluded me.  I’m not exactly sure how a mascot’s name and me trying a soda tie in together, but that doesn’t matter when it’s something as silly as this.  A nice lady I work with, whom I will name Good Morning, put me on a mission to find Strawberry Shasta.  Upon searching for it I found that the only places near me that sold Shasta were Brookshire Bros. grocery stores.  Now I’m not sure how it is where you live, but around here Brookshire Bros. are located in more rural areas so I rarely see one.  Well, Good Morning was driving past one by chance and made the U-turn to check it out.  Long story somewhat shorter, she brought me a Shasta Strawberry to review. 

Glancing at the ingredients I quickly see that Shasta Strawberry is chock full of chemical goodness.  I wasn’t expecting anything amazing here, so my thoughts have not been swayed.  This can art is keeping me in a positive mood.  It feels so fun and retro while keeping the can fresh and eye-catching.  Hopefully the flavor is on the fun side.

Twist smells of strawberries.

It smells of strawberry soda.  Ok, a little more detail is necessary.  It’s not quite as sugary smelling as I thought it would be, but the chemical mixture inside keeps it from smelling like fresh strawberries or any nonsense like that.

Wow, color me somewhat slightly impressed.  Shasta Strawberry, even with 36 grams of sugar in it, doesn’t taste a sugar sandwich made with sugar, marshmallows, sugar, sugar, and some strawberry syrup.  No, in fact this tastes merely like sugar, carbonated water, and strawberry syrup which oddly enough is a step in the right direction for strawberry sodas.  Enough blabbering, this tastes like the carbonated version of those little strawberry candies your grandmother bought back in 1985.  If you want to buy over five pounds of these candies or just want to know what I’m talking about click this fabulous link.  Anywho, these strawberry candies (and Strawberry Shasta) have the talent of chemically mimicking both the tart and sweet aspects of our friend the strawberry.  It is this feature that allows me to gently nudge Shasta Strawberry past its numerous counterparts.

~A

 

Flathead Lake Black Raspberry

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Montana’s Legendary Soda, Flathead Lake, is known around the parts as almost being an above average soda.  For whatever reasons it never seems to be able to touch that rung of the latter and ends up falling off before it can achieve greatness.  Today’s Flathead Lake soda flavor is black raspberry.  I’m quite happy with this flavor selection as it is the superior taste when compared to its fake blue counterpart.  So there you have it.  Flathead Lake soda is average, but this flavor is one of my favorites.  Who will win out?

There's some kind of copyright infringement here, but I'm not sure who the guilty party is.

A delicious candy grape aroma rises from the bottle, which is odd since it’s a blackberry soda.  If I pretend hard enough I can make myself believe that I also smell the blackberry, but I can’t.  Hopefully I’ll be able to taste it.

Ok, so the taste is a bit grapey as well.  I’m going to go ahead and promise never to use the term “grapey” ever again.  Let’s move on, shall we?  Thankfully the second half of my experience does indeed taste like an artificially delicious black raspberry full of sugar and chemicals.  Still though, if someone were to give me this soda in a glass I’d assume it was grape, that can’t be good for the Flathead Lake flavor department.  Even though the flavor is mostly wrong it’s still a very tasty soda and the blackberry aftertaste is rather pleasant.  If anything I might label this as a grape/raspberry hybrid and go from there.  The carbonation level for this confused liquid is small, but tingly so it never really gets in the way.  All 43 grams of sugar are accounted for as you’d never mistake this for something healthy.  This level of sweetness makes Flathead Lake Black Raspberry ride the line of “drink with meal” and “drink for dessert”.  Flavor confusion aside this is probably my favorite entry from Flathead Lake.  Great job, guys!

~A

 

Sof Drink Grape

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It has been three years since the kool kat on the Sof Drink label has visited my home.  Today this Jamaican feline finds himself on a bottle of Sof Drink Grape and I’m happy to see him.  I just got through traipsing around a cemetery so I’m a bit thirsty from all the walking.  Thankfully my tongue knew exactly what it wanted when I opened the fridge.  It wanted to be reunited with grape soda and the kool kat was the perfect door man for the job.  Even though Sof Drink Grape claims to have the original Jamaican flavor (of what I’m not sure) it still uses HFCS in its production.  Currently I’m a bit too thirsty to care and while I should be drinking water to quench this thirst my willpower isn’t strong enough to do so.  So let me dive into this grape soda and see what happens.

A grape soda without any real scent… that’s a first.  At least I think that’s a first, I didn’t really feel like researching the previous sentence so I suggest you just trust me on it.  If I place one nostril over the mouth of the bottle and inhale deeply I begin to smell a candy grape aroma, but it really is quite faint.  Something tells me the flavor will be much more powerful.

Twist things this drink is grape.

Well that’s fun.  Sof Drink Grape tastes like a melted grape popsicle with some added carbonation.  I could honestly stop writing the review at this point, but only one sentence of description might not look so hot.  It’s a very thick grape soda in the fact that it grabs hold of all the pores of my mouth and refuses to let go.  Even after the velvet curtain of syrup falls the actors on the stage stay there to be crushed under its weight.  The carbonation is the only thing keeping this beverage from being an Otter Pop that never found the freezer.  Alexander the Grape has been poured into a bottle and someone ruffled his hair up a little.  While this aspect makes it a very sweet drink it’s not so sugary that your question if you should continue consumption with each sip. 

I’ve already made the popsicle comparison twice now which shows that I really didn’t have any more in my sleeve.  This shows me that I should just stop and you just trust that the comparison is all you need to understand what Sof Drink Grape is.  It’s a tasty, thick, grape soda that tastes like a popsicle.  There I go again.

~A

 

 

Barrel Brothers Root Beer

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Two guys dressed in barrels pose for a caricature of themselves.  Apparently they loved it so much they decided the picture would look great on a bottle of root beer.  These two guys I’m speaking of are the Barrel Brothers, and I will be consuming their soda today.  The label gives me no history of Barrel Brothers Root Beer, but it does tell me that this is from the makers of Apple Beer.  Apple Beer if you remember had the potential to be amazing, but faltered.  Here’s hoping the Barrel Brothers, Mac and Jack (two names I made up), do themselves proud with their product.  It’s a HFCS sweetened root beer so it’s not off to a great start in that department, although that doesn’t mean the taste can’t overcome the ingredients.

Twist was once a brother, but there could be only one.

A pleasant vanilla aroma with a hint of marshmallow rises from the bottle.  I’m quickly forgetting I ever saw HFCS on the label at all.  Perhaps the taste will completely wash that memory away.

That’s good root beer.  That’s really good root beer.  The scent translates directly into the taste as each sip is smothered with the smooth sensation of vanilla.  The vanilla flavor is so rich that it made me forget I was drinking a root beer for a brief moment.  At the end of each sip though the root beer rises from the foamy grave and grasps at the roof of my mouth, biting it with carbonation and a tasty root beer taste.  Barrel Brothers Root Beer would pair very well with ice cream as the licorice/wintergreen flavors you might find in other root beers are absent.  This is strictly about the vanilla, almost marshmallow, sensations mixed with an already good root beer.  It doesn’t build on itself that much which is surprising to me given the richness of it.  If I must pick nits about this soda there is a slight chemical taste that arises occasionally, but it’s not enough for me to shoo anyone away.  All in all, Barrel Brothers Root Beer is a treat that any root beer enthusiast would enjoy.  No, it’s not made from the greatest ingredients, but the flavor more than makes up for it.

~A

 

Party Pop

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It’s a little after midnight and I wasn’t even sure I was going to write a review today, but apparently I am.  My wife and I live with three animals so the house is rarely quiet.  It’s so rare that when you couple a silent house with darkness it becomes a little creepy.  I snuck downstairs, as to not wake the puppy, and blindly reached into the refrigerator.  What greeted me was a fairly creepy site in itself.  Two oddly drawn children stare at me from the label of this bottle of Party Pop.  Well technically the little boy is staring at me and the little girl is infatuated with the previously mentioned boy.  I don’t know what Party Pop is, but from the label alone it claims to be “The Original Foamy Soda”.  I’m going to go ahead and call that a lie without even researching it.  Other words listed on the bottle are “sangaria”, “cheers!”, “non-alcoholic”, something written in a foreign language, and weirdest of all… “kids”.  Over the ingredients I find out that this is an apple flavored soda, so it shouldn’t be terrible because “kids”.  For as strange as Party Pop is, it’s made with HFCS so it’s not off-the-rails bizarre.  The time has come for me to try “The Original Foamy Soda” known as Party Pop.  Since the “kids” seem to love it, hopefully I will too.

I think the foreign language that’s on the bottle, and now I see on the cap, is Japanese.  For the record, this is bottled in California.  Such an odd soda.  It smells like apple juice.  I’d go into more descriptive terminology if it smelled any different than apple juice, but it doesn’t.  Apple anything isn’t listed as an ingredient.  No apple juice, artificial apple, natural (apple) flavor, mock apples, how ‘bout them apples, there’s nothing about apples.  Fantastic.  I hope this blows my socks off, because that would just complete this peculiar experience.

Twist could steal her away in an instant.

WHOA ALL THAT FOAM!  Kidding.  It is a little foamier than your standard soda, but I’m not sure I’d make it a marketing point.  Perhaps if I still had my youthful innocence I could see myself pouring this into a glass and pretending to drink beer.  That’s exactly what this is, by the way.  This is kid beer.  It’s the color of beer, it develops a head like beer, and it’s called Party Pop like beer.  It’s “kids” beer.  Anywho.  It tastes like an apple soda that didn’t quite make it. 

The carbonation level is light and fizzy, fun some might say.  On the other hand that apple juice scent I was picking up earlier isn’t quite as honest.  There is an apple flavor being represented here, but it’s constantly haunted by a bitter ghost.  Before the apple flavor even hits the bitter ghost resides in my mouth chasing all of good flavors away.  The good flavors that do stay have to walk through said ghost, thus tainting their once tasty skins.  Slimed if you will.  What I’m about to say isn’t 100% accurate, but it’s the best comparison I can think of at this time of night.  Party Pop tastes like it’s 80% Apple Juice and 20% beer.  For some reason I capitalized “apple juice”, but not beer.  No idea why, moving on.  This beer/apple juice hybrid obviously isn’t working for me, but it’s not horrible.  Actually I take that back.  With each sip I try the bitterness builds on itself making Party Pop less “pop” and more “mistake.

This kid on the label with his cocked party hat is really starting to bother me.  It’s like he’s bragging about gaining the eye of the girl next to him.  Like he’s gloating to me that she’ll never be mine.  Dude you’re like 10 at the most.  I could take you out with one punch and I’m a weak 30 something.  Whataya going to do?  “Kids”.

~A

 

Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange

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It’s 9:00 in the morning, which is usually way too early for a soda review.  Last week though was lacking in said reviews so I figured I’d try to get an early start to this week by writing one in the A.M.  When I opened my fridge I tried to find the most breakfast like flavor and Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange was the most obvious at hand.  After pondering it for a moment I realized that strawberry orange isn’t exactly a common flavor, yet it seems like the two would pair fairly often in the soda world.  The two should create a tart yet sweet sensation that’s fun for the whole family.  I’ve never been particularly impressed with the ingredients of Flathead Lake sodas so we’ll just hope it delivers big on flavor.  That’s what this is all about anyway, right?

A fun fruit punchesque aroma simultaneously greets my nose and excites my brain for the flavor that may be contained within this glass prison.  The bright red-orange color of the soda itself is also rather inviting as the beads of condensation roll down the neck of the bottle.  If I was to rate this on just appearance and scent then Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange would be doing very well.  Of course all citizens of the Carbo-Nation know that those two are only part of what makes a soda great. 

I immediately can tell that if this were fizzier I’d like it a lot more.  There is indeed a created flavor that begins to taste like strawberry/orange yet it takes the exit to cotton candyville somewhere near the end of each sip.  This is made even more noticeable by the amount of carbonation used in the beverage as I said less than three sentences ago.  While the carbonation levels are not low by any means, if the fizz levels where higher my tongue would be focused on the tiny explosions happening on it rather than the vague sugary flavor this soda eventually becomes.  The vague sugary flavor isn’t terrible, mind you.  I just wish that the initial strawberry/orange combination had been strong enough to last throughout each swig.  Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange is still a good drink in terms of taste, look, and scent.  Thankfully, there is no terrible aftertaste, but the velvet curtain of syrup fall on the stage that is my mouth.  All in all this soda starts off quite tasty, but the soda itself is its own undoing.  Like so many sodas before it the flavor can’t support the weight of all the drinks taken prior.  This causes the soda drinking experience to go from enjoyable to consuming liquid sugar just to finish it.  It’s this aspect that makes Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange an average soda.

~A

Flathead Lake Strawberry Orange580.JPG

Twist keeps asking for a pair of tiny sunglasses.